Corey Hilton | Helping Others Find the “Naked Truth” of What’s Holding Them Back

David Pasqualone: Hey friends, welcome to this week’s episode of Hanging Out with David Pasqualone and Friends. Today, you and I are going to spend time with Corey Hilton. Corey is a Canadian friend of ours who grew up with his grandparents and they were so close he actually called them mom and dad. Then, as he grew up, he started getting bullied and he decided to work out.
He became very defined, very strong. And then by meeting a friend that worked at a club, a male strip club, he ended up going there to visit and the owner offered him a job on the spot. So between the absence of his father and being thrust into this world, of Male Exotic [00:01:00] Dancing, you’re going to see some of Corey’s journey as he goes through life and then how he has kind of a revelation and he starts working with a coach and then he starts writing And it helps him see so much more of his life and he finds purpose.
Now he is a coach, he is running a publishing company, and he is here to share his remarkable story with you today so you can not only see the similarities within your journeys, but how to adapt and overcome and not waste any more time in life. But to really connect with your own inner self and how to achieve more of your goals in life.
So with this time, welcome to The Corey Hilton Story.
Hey, Corey, how’s it going today, brother?

Corey Hilton: Very, very good, my friend. I’m enjoying a nice day off up here in British Columbia. Canada is smoking hot outside right now, but it is [00:02:00] actually a holiday right now.
I don’t think it’s a holiday down there in the U S but I’m enjoying this day because, uh, Hey, every day above ground is a great day.

David Pasqualone: Awesome. And now
what holiday is it in the U S we’re recording this August 1st in America, which is also August 1st in Canada, but what’s your holiday that you’re celebrating there?

Corey Hilton: Yeah, we have like, um, basically there’s this provincial holidays here. So right at this particular moment, it’s a BC day holiday. So it’s just one of those things that, um, truthfully it’s a day off and that’s, but even though it’s a day off in this world that I’m in, there is no rest for the wicked. I am always, even on my days off trying my best to.
Be productive and obviously make the minutes count instead of just counting the minutes, right? So, uh, at the same time, you know, that’s what life’s all about. Just make, to me, in a lot of ways is creating great memories, making new relationships, having good connections. And that’s really a lot of what I’ve been doing in this last little while based on, uh, just what I’ve been doing with my book and what I’ve been doing with my company and stuff.
So it’s exciting times right now. Really [00:03:00] exciting times.

David Pasqualone: Excellent. And we’re listening. I just told the listeners. A little bit about you and a little bit about this episode. So they’re looking forward to just hanging out together and hearing your story and getting to know each other. Um, so I’m pumped, dude.
Now, when you were saying that, you know, taking advantage and counting the time and seconds, phrase that again. How did you say that? Cause you’re I like to count the minutes. I don’t like to count the minutes. I like to make the minutes count. I really do. Like, you know, I mean, I guess like, I guess I can say it like this, David, I’ve done one too many jobs or JOBs where I’ve been sitting there and looking at that little clock in the corner of the computer, counting the minutes and just waiting for five o’clock to ding so that I could get off work to be able to enjoy life.

Corey Hilton: Now I’m trying my best to make those minutes count. So I’m actually enjoying what I’m doing and passionate about what I do, right. When I have a bit more of a purpose to life in my former career, I was a bit of a free bird, kind of just freewheeling it and letting the chips in. Follow Where They May In Life.
And I’ve [00:04:00] just had so many, so many great learning experiences, especially in this last couple of years. Um, I think a lot of us have due to the pandemic and stuff, uh, you get that time to really kind of really see what’s, what, where you really want to go as a person. And for me, I just really dove right in and, and took a lot of time to work on myself.
Where I didn’t before. And I think for a lot of guys, we kind of just let the chips fall. We just do what we got to do. We’re, we’re men, we got to go out there and, you know, be the hunter gatherer or whatever it may be. And then you forget about the little things that are really important. And I really honestly did that in my former marriage and in my former career a lot.
So now that I’m more focused, it’s, and aware of these things, it’s, it’s a game
changer. Really is. Yeah, no, it reminded me of the verse, redeeming the time for the days are evil. So it’s just, we’re always supposed to live like today’s our last day on earth, but still plan and live like we’re going to be here 50 years.

David Pasqualone: So that was awesome. Right off the bat, we’re getting great content. So let’s do this. The format is past, present, future. So let’s just start off in your story, [00:05:00] Corey. Where were you born? What was your upbringing like? Did you have siblings? Were your mom and dad in the home? Was it a nightmare? Was it a dream?
Let’s just start off the real story about Corey Hilton. No problem at all. It’s kind of original, David. It’s crazy as it sounds. I was actually, uh, I was born way back in 1970. So I’m 52 years old now. And the thing was, is I was born in a place called Surrey, British Columbia, just a little municipality outside of Vancouver, uh, middle class family.

Corey Hilton: We, we had, you know, food was on the table, so to speak, but at the same time, and then we never struggled, but it was always just kind of mediocre. It was just kind of where I was and you, my, my family was depression era. So being that I was adopted to my grandparents at a very early age, I actually had a very original upbringing.
So when you’re asking about siblings, it’s, it’s an interesting dynamic because when you move up a generation, what happens is your aunts and uncles in a way legally become your brothers and sisters in a strange way. So from a [00:06:00] very early age, I was actually doing things that a lot of other kids weren’t doing.
And I was actually, you know, Because my, my, my folks had already raised three kids before me, they were really understanding as far as maybe letting me kind of just do what I wanted to do within their parameters to a certain degree. So when it came down to my dad, he was always really a hardworking man.
I always looked up to him so much. I call my grandfather, my dad, by the way, uh, he’s passed away now. He passed away a couple of years ago and my grandmother passed away about four years ago now, but they were just really good, good. Good parents all the way around, but truthfully, they only had so many tools.
We’re, we’re all, you know, born without manuals, whether it be a kid or parents, we don’t necessarily have a rule book. So they did the best they could with the tools that they had. And I’m really proud of, of, you know, not only my accomplishments, but the accomplishments of my, my parents in so many ways, but.
At the same time, I kind of went into a little bit more of an unorthodox industry, of [00:07:00] course, and that was because they gave me that, that ability to fall on my face, or for that matter, said, hey, as long as you don’t get messed up, or you’re not getting into, you’re still keeping your grades up in school and all that stuff, they basically said, hey, you know, fill your boots, do what you want to do, um, as long as you’re not hurting anybody in the process.
You know, have fun, kid. And so I did. I had a lot of fun, but, but realistically, you know, when it comes down to just my background, um, I, I’ll, I’ll say that there was a little bit of emotional disconnection, my friend. And that’s the biggest thing that I focus on a lot in my book is emotional disconnection, because when your parents don’t give you a lot of that connection, you don’t hear a lot of I love yous and honeys and sweeties and all that stuff in your household.
You’re kind of hungry for it a little bit later on in life. And so oddly enough, that is strange of an industry as I was in, I was always looking for an emotional connection with my audience. I was always trying to draw emotions out of them because I had such a hard time even expressing it myself. So on stage, when I was on [00:08:00] stage, I hid behind that alter ego, trying to extract those emotions.
And, um, sometimes I wasn’t able to convey those in my own personal life. So that’s, that was a bit of a struggle that I had, but that Everybody has their struggles, right? And you just, it’s a matter of overcoming them. So,
yeah. And so from your upbringing, what happened to your mom and dad? Were they just not in the place to raise you?
So they gave you to one of their parents. How did that arrangement come about?
Oh, good question. I’ve never even been asked that before. That’s really good. Um, well actually my, my real biological mother was part of my life. Like through my teens, I would Um, you know, she was obviously directly in my family.
Um, but you know, she was young when she had me, she was only 17 years old. So it was really a blessing that my, my folks took me and adopted me at such a young age that I actually really believed that they were my parent parents. Like they were my real biological parents until I was about 12 years old.
And then at that time I was actually as well. Um, given an option to be introduced to my actual [00:09:00] biological father, and that was an interesting dynamic because I really loved my grandfather and looked at him as my father, and I didn’t really feel like I, I didn’t really have a desire or a need to meet, meet my biological father.
Just being real, I just didn’t, it wasn’t there for me. But then I, I reluctantly said, yes, you know what, I accept that. I’ll, I’ll meet him. I went there and said I would. And the crazy thing was, is that when I committed to that, Unfortunately, I was waiting for him to show up that day and he never showed up.
So when that happened, it was kind of a bit of a devastating thing that I didn’t even really kind of realize until later on in life that that hit me kind of hard that he did not show up that day. And so I guess in a weird sense, I guess there was a little bit of an abandonment issue there that I wasn’t even really truly aware of.
Until far later in life. So we grow and we learn, right. And I’ve been able to kind of connect some of those dots now, um, through my writing process and just my own personal development process. So, yeah, that’s kind of it. And that’s all. [00:10:00]

David Pasqualone: Yeah. And the
relationship we have with our parents, but men with their fathers and women with their mothers, especially, it’s huge impact and, you know, they’ve done study after study of the average convict in prisons and it’s upwards of 90%.
All right. Of the men in prison, in federal prison in America. grew up without a father in the home. And, you know, sadly that’s becoming more and more common, but like you made a great point. Your biological father was that man you never met, but your dad’s who loves you and raises you. So that’s fantastic.
You had your grandpa. Now, when did you actually realize he wasn’t, how old were you? I might’ve missed that or I didn’t hear it clearly. Where, how old were you when you actually realized he wasn’t your biological dad? 12. Okay. And that’s the age where I was. I was actually 12. Yeah. Okay. Um, and then when that happened, Can you hear me okay?
Yeah. [00:11:00] We just got a little bit of a delay, unfortunately. Oh, okay. I apologize. So, when that happened, did you pretty easy transition? Was it subconscious and you didn’t realize for years that it was a, it was a bigger, you know, awakening moment than you thought? Or did you struggle with it when it happened?
It sounded like you took it pretty well and moved on, but subconscious, it opened some doors you weren’t expecting.

Corey Hilton: I honestly, David, I can’t honestly say how much it really affected me in the moment. Like as a kid, I was just kind of like, well, whatever, I have parents, you know, no loss here. You know, I, I looked at it like that, but then I think that it kind of came back to, like I said, connecting those dots. And, and I did a lot of dissection in this last few years, as far as like why I’ve had the reactions that I’ve had, maybe with relationships, for example, where.
Maybe a relationship failed and it didn’t work out and then I would overly, I would be [00:12:00] overly emotional breaking up with someone on a way higher level than most guys would be. And then I, and I didn’t really understand why. And then when I kind of connected that dot and thought maybe it was just because of that abandonment thing a little bit, maybe that is a little bit of a trigger that I didn’t, was not really aware of.
That kind of made me kind of go, well, Okay, I can accept that. Now, whether that’s true or not, I honestly don’t know. But I’m just saying that, that, that I believe that that is a component of my struggles when it came to, you know, like I said, being a little bit more emotional instead of being emotionally intelligent at times in my life, you know?
Yeah, 100%.
Undoubtedly, without question, would that affect a child or an adult? Um, and I remember meeting my father for the first time when I was 12. And I met him one time and then he didn’t come back in my life. Yes. And, um, it was under bad circumstances. It wasn’t good [00:13:00] circumstances. Um, so the guy was never part of my life.
And then when I was 12, we grew up very poor and he was very wealthy. And then when I was 12, my mom finally was going to go after him for money, for child support. And the courts ordered us to see each other. So I felt dirty to begin with, like, Oh, he only wants to see me because of money. And then like you, you went to meet your dad and he wasn’t there.
So it’s like, whether you realize or not, that’s a massive blow to a guy’s psyche. And then I met with my dad and then I never saw him again for eight years. So I can kind of connect. Yeah. So when you, uh, After you had the setup to meet your dad and then he didn’t show up, looking back, do you feel that put a deeper need for that approval and that, um, kind of male [00:14:00] camaraderie or did it just kind of callous you and break you from relationships?

Corey Hilton: No, I didn’t. It was not the latter. In fact, actually, what’s really interesting, I love that question because my grandfather, who I adored, like I said, like I have nothing but good memories as far as like, you know, him coming home from work as a little kid and running across the house and hugging him around the knees and getting just, just to get an emotional connection with him was slim to none.
So just having that was like, so I was so hungry for Now, I was probably hungry for for it for more than one reason. It was probably a little bit to do with the, like I said, biological father, not being in the equation, but at the same time, it also came down to when you don’t hear a lot of those things, like when you’re not really feeling that emotional connection, you’re only getting so much from that person that you look up to.
Like, for example, I’m a former bodybuilder, right? I went on stage as a bodybuilder did what 1 percent of society does and diets down and does the whole process from [00:15:00] beginning to end and gets up on a scale. Stage and competes. Right. That was one of my most proud, my, my, my biggest, most proud accomplishments I’ve ever had in my life.
’cause it was hard. It was really a tough thing to do. Now he showed up that day with my grandmother and they saw my show and my dad shook my hand and he was so proud of me that day. I can remember that. And then I can also remember one other day when I went to court against someone that actually said that I.
Hit their car. Believe it or not, I went to court without a lawyer and I beat them in court and they had a lawyer. Now, my dad was like just so proud again in that , but again, what I’m saying, David, is I can only count these moments on one hand for my entire life. Right? Some people get it every day, right? I didn’t get that.
Now, I’m not here to cry a sob story. I’m just saying words count. Words are important. Russell Wilson is one of my biggest, I’m one of his biggest fans. I’m a big Seahawks fan. Okay, now. Even though he’s not with the Seahawks anymore, I still do appreciate him for one thing that his father, his upbringing, his [00:16:00] dad always said to him before he walked out the door, go be great today, go be great today and embedded that into that kid’s head.
So what did he do? He defeated all odds and was great. And he’s probably going to be a future hall of famer one day without having the height that most people do in the industry, right? He has a deep faith. He has not only just in, in organized religion, but deep faith in his self. Right? Like, he’s just driven, and it shows, and he accomplishes great things every single day.
But the kid that doesn’t hear that, it’s kind of like the rich dad, poor dad thing, right? When you don’t hear it, you don’t understand how to, how money works. Then you just go out there and you work like the poor dad did. You just learn what you learn. I am, I brought some of the stuff that my parents taught me into my own marriage and was living a bit of a Ricky and Lucy type of relationship in the year 2000.
Now it was the right intent. But it wasn’t the right thing. So I ended up in divorce after eight years, right? Oh, let’s let’s connect things right.
Because we’re

Corey Hilton: in a
different
Corey Hilton: gen. [00:17:00]
Yeah, no, no, no. There’s a delay and I apologize to you and the listeners, but let’s connect those thoughts before we get to the divorce.
So you were with your grandfather and grandmom, your mom and dad. You are growing up at what age did you get into bodybuilding in high school or after high school?

Corey Hilton: I honestly, I was in high school, my friend, I was 17 years old and I was getting bullied in high school and I didn’t want to be bullied anymore.
So I wanted to be able to take control and be the best way I could control that without actually having to take physical action against anybody was to get in the gym and work out. So I just made myself into a beast. And that was something that I enjoyed doing. I spent. Five years of solid training from 17 till, well, 22, 23 before I jumped out on stage, right?
So, but I had a real big passion for it. It was really great.
So between, and you’ve mentioned stage and our listeners don’t understand what that means yet. So between your birth, And [00:18:00] around that time at 22, is there anything we missed in your life story, Corey, or anything significant that we need to know for the future?

Corey Hilton: Yeah, no problem there, David. So I have two different stages that I’m referring to, and I’ve kind of mixed it up a little bit here in our original conversation, but what I mean by stage right now, when I’m talking about bodybuilding is of course the bodybuilding stage going through the entire. Dieting process, bulking process, all the stuff that comes with the territory, learning how to do your routine, all that stuff, and getting up on the stage and physically doing a bodybuilding show, a pre judging in the morning and at night doing the night show, right?
There’s a lot that goes into it, obviously, and I looked at it as the ultimate art form because I was actually feeling it. Forming the body into what I could with the genetics that I had, right? So that that’s one. But my other stage that I spent 25 years on was from the age of 17 until almost 43 years old.
I was actually a male exotic dancer, and that’s a whole different arena and a whole different stage that brought me into some really crazy [00:19:00] places. But at the same time, I’m really happy that I did it because when it comes down to it, again, I had these amazing memories. And these amazing connections and stereotypically people might think certain things about that industry and I can understand why.
I really, truly can understand why. But I actually was somebody that was a bit of an anomaly in that industry. I was a monogamous stripper, believe it or not, even through my, my relationships, regardless of whether they were a weak, a month, a year, 10 years. I was always very, very good about doing that because first off, I just really just didn’t need the hassle in my life.
I really thought it was just way too much stress doing all that stuff. And of course it’s not, you’re not living your truth. So at the same time for me in an industry that, that has so much of that crazy stuff going on for me, it was better to stay on the sidelines and learn from other people’s experiences a lot of the time.
And that’s what I did. So yes, I’ve been on a couple of different stages, so
to speak. Yeah, now talk about living your truth. Where did you pick that up in your life? [00:20:00] And was it at an early age as a child, was in your teens, as in your adulthood? So talk about what it means to you and what point in your life did you start adopting that?

Corey Hilton: Yeah, well, it means a whole lot now. It didn’t mean so much in my past. Now, what I mean by living my truth is this, being on stage, And being even under a different stage name and everything, you’re living behind an alter ego to a certain degree, right? I’m performer, I’m an entertainer. It didn’t matter who the person was out there in the audience.
I was there to do a job and I loved doing that job, right? So that was something that obviously, you know, I had a passion for because I stayed in the industry for so many years. But here’s the, uh, the wild part about my story. I wrote this book. And this didn’t happen until I started roughly four years ago, somewhere around that, when I started actually writing.
But until then, I really wasn’t [00:21:00] really living my truth. I was hiding behind a lot of other things. And so what I’m saying by that is, is I didn’t have an awareness of my core values, for example. And how I found that was through my writing process. So when you’re asking You know, your truth. I’ve really only really discovered my real truth in my late 40s, believe it or not, right?
So it’s been a liberating process because I’ve been able to be aware of those core values, the feelings that are attached to those, and also more importantly, Being aware of the opposite feeling of my core values, so that when I’m triggered by something, or when somebody’s saying something, I know I’m aware of it, and I can handle it without emotions, and handle it more with emotional intelligence, and give a more rational, responsible response, so to speak.
So, that all happened, David, through my writing process, and I was so blessed to be able to actually have An amazing publishing company, an amazing authenticity coach that helped me to be able to write more authentically and become a far more authentic and just better person all the way around. [00:22:00] Because stuff like I’m doing right now, my friend, I probably would not have been able to really do it the way I can now.
Even just being on a regular podcast and talking like we are, you’d probably be talking to a little bit of a different person five years ago to a certain degree. I would probably would have held back on a few things, right? So now I’m just an open book. Yeah, and that’s it.
You hit so many great points. Um, number one, if we’re the same as we were five years ago, there’s probably actually something wrong in our life because we should always be growing and changing and developing, not deteriorating.
Don’t get, don’t get stuck on meth and go backwards, but I’m talking about moving forwards. But, uh, When you’re talking about all of us, you know, it’s not how we start, it’s how we finish. I was just telling my friend’s kids last night, it’s not how we start, it’s how we finish. Even if you smooch the pooch to today, right now, as you’re listening to this podcast, Corey and I can tell you firsthand in our 40s and 50s, it’s not how you start, it’s how you finish.

So, for [00:23:00] you, Corey, I know it’s different for everybody, but talk about that journey. Talk about how you used writing and it started unlocking these memories and these doors and helping you focus in on what you really love and what you hated. So if someone’s listening right now, again, it may be different for everybody, but how did you start finding your purpose and passion?
What are steps that they can follow?

Corey Hilton: Yeah, I mean, I hate to say this. It was a little bit of a systematic process because I was taught it from my coach. Right. But when it comes down to like, there’s, there’s, there’s definitely a few layers to this, but for me, the more deeply that I actually went into this and, and, and lived this more as a standard, instead of just trying to learn something, the better.
Right? So what I’m trying to say here is, is that like, it was like, I was mentioning about values and feelings and all that good stuff, being aware. Right. is massively important because to me, I look at it like this. If I’m not aware of my core values, I [00:24:00] don’t have them written down. Like for example, my core value of creativity is excitement.
Okay. So the feeling, the feeling is excitement is attached to my creativity is what I’m trying to say. Right. So for me, if I’m lacking excitement in my life, I need to bump up my creativity. So being aware of that, or for that matter, maybe it’s relationships. And I have the feeling of connection that comes with relationships.
Maybe I’m feeling disconnected a little bit. Not everybody wakes up having a great day every day. That’s not realistic. It’s just not life, right? But if I’m aware of where that feeling is coming from, then I can go to my relationships and see which one is maybe being a little bit disconnected. Maybe it’s my mom.
Maybe it’s my girlfriend, whatever it is. I can actually be, I can go there and. Address it. See if there’s, if it’s maybe a conflict that I’m having or something that’s bothering me, I can actually do that now. Whereas I didn’t have that way to connect those dots before is what I’m saying. So like, as an example, when I’m talking about my, my former marriage, right?
Like [00:25:00] I always communicated with my ex wife. I never connected. So I wasn’t really working with her. I wasn’t finding out what her values were. I wasn’t finding out what her goals and dreams were. I was just more me, me, me, me, me. And that really actually happened by being that way. And I’m being honest with this by being that way, without that awareness, I was always, I was really, really playing the blame game a lot of the time in my life.
So I would blame everybody else for my problems. Oh, you know, she did this to me. How dare she do this to me? I’m a good guy. I had the best intentions, like, and I’d point the finger. But the liberating part of my process when it came to doing this writing, and I hope I’m answering this question the right way for you, is that when it came down to being able to accept some of those things, it wasn’t saying that I, I was totally to blame for some of these issues, but I wanted to take on the weight of my own responsibility.
So here’s a great example for you. When I came down to my demise in my marriage, I was able to go back at this age now, not from [00:26:00] 15 years ago when we were going through all the emotions and everything, but I was able to go back at this age and say, okay, Monica, my ex, I went back after only speaking to her a couple of times in 15 years, because we had a pretty bitter divorce.
I was able to go back and say, I realized that I had at least 50 percent responsibility for the demise of our relationship. And this is why I was not excited anymore because I didn’t have creativity in my life. I changed as a person and I drove you to the actions that you took. And doing that not only took I’m David Pasqualone and I’m here to protect your home.
I’m here to talk to you about how to protect your family. I’m here to talk to you about how to protect your home. That layer for her too, regardless of whether I ever see that person again, it’s just a good thing that I did that actually makes me feel better about myself as a [00:27:00] person, not playing that blame game anymore.
So the biggest lesson that I’ve had in this whole process, when it comes down to being an authenticity coach and coaching other people, how to, Basically, connect those dots themselves, as I said, is layered. It comes with understanding the inner critic that we all have within us. We’ve all heard that one before, the saboteur, basically being able to really understand that you have to integrate body, heart, and mind a lot of the time, you know, really when it comes down to it, not just one, because I’ve led with my heart one too many times and not led with my mind, right?
Managing your own inner conflicts. We all have them, right? And then just, Again, understanding how authenticity and emotional intelligence work in conjunction with one another so that you’re not going so high on emotions that you’re, you’re speaking inauthentically when your emotions get too high. I always try to keep my emotions down when I’m getting triggered, take a walk, do what I need to do, respond with a rational mindset instead of just an automatic response.
Because we’re unfortunately in an era [00:28:00] where we have a lot of text conversations. Comments on social media that are very impersonal can be very much taken out of context, and it’s an automatic response that really doesn’t necessarily speak the way that you can when you’re actually getting the body language and you’re actually right in front of someone.
So I hope that kind of makes sense, but I kind of strayed off a little bit.

David Pasqualone: No, that absolutely makes sense. And if we were to zoom in, To the writing itself, what kind of writing did you start off with? Did you start off with daily journaling? Did you start off writing in a novel format, like chronological life?
How did you start your writing?

Corey Hilton: As crazy as it sounds, I promote journaling so much because I, I firmly believe that it actually is such a healing experience when you actually, especially when you can go back and actually review maybe your diary or whatever it is from a year ago and see what place you were in.
I do, I do really promote doing it. Now, did I do that? No. To be straightforward, I never did. Um, [00:29:00] I chose at a point in my life where my parents were in bad health. Um, well, actually my grandfather was, was in bad health and I was at the point where I did not want to release my book before my parents had passed away.
So I was in this position where I realized that, that I had a good opportunity. I had a lot of people asking me, Corey, you should write a book. You’ve told me too many stories. You need to write a book. So I did do that. But when I started writing, I’ll be straightforward. This is crazy. But. I didn’t even write, I didn’t even type it out.
I actually took a security job for 12 hour shifts, seven days a week, working the night shift. And I sat inside my car with my iPhone and I actually used voice to text. And I basically spoke into my phone and then I went and I literally like timelined everything and went, okay, where was I on 9 11? Oh yeah, I was in Georgia and I was here.
And I just brought stories up for the time that I was actually Speaking of, and then I took all [00:30:00] those notes and that I put into the phone, did my little edits on it. And that’s how I wrote the, the vast majority of my book. And then went of course, and got a publishing company to work with, and then went through the process of rewriting the whole thing all over again, because I had to, because I was injecting a lot more of my, my learning from, from this coach, right?
So now, that I’ve actually done that. Now, what I’m really passionate about is helping other authors to be able to do the same thing, whether they’ve written a book already or they’re looking right from a clean slate. I love, love doing that because every single person that I work with is a snowflake. And what I mean by that, I know that’s a term that’s not necessarily used the nicest way at times, but we are all individual and we all are unique.
That’s what I’m talking about. So you have a completely different set of core values and feelings attached to them. So I need to, as you’re, if I’m working with you, I want to bring those out and I want to bring those out into your writing so that you write based off of [00:31:00] your true authenticity and that paints a far better picture for the audience, right?
So yeah, that’s, that’s pretty much it in a nutshell. I just kind of put it together and boom, it was, wasn’t, didn’t take too long and that was, it was published.

David Pasqualone: As crazy as it sounds. Now, we’re going to go back, and for the audience, I want to make sure, when we have a show, we bring on people from all different backgrounds and worldviews.
And our audience knows that our primary worldview is a Christian worldview. So when they hear on, Cory’s coming on, he’s a male stripper, right? They’re like, what? But, everybody has value, like you said, and all the stuff that you’re saying, I just keep thinking of Bible verse after Bible verse, and you know, it talks about how to guard our heart, for out of the issues of life, uh, you know, commit our works unto the Lord, our thoughts shall be established, and everything you’re saying in your vernacular, It’s all biblically supported.
That’s why it works, right? All good comes from God. But when [00:32:00] I look at my upbringing and you had your upbringing, I was under the impression, like, you do not want to be a male stripper. That’s wrong. When you were brought up, was that the worldview you were brought under? Like, don’t be a male stripper.
That’s bad. That’s wrong. Or was it, Hey, as long as you’re not hurting anybody, go ahead and do it. What was your background? Cause that’s not something the average person does. And if they do, you made a career of it, like 25 years. And that’s from the people I know that have been in it, male or female, that’s a crazy industry.
And that’s not something that’s normally healthy. And you correct me if I’m wrong. I mean, there’s usually a lot of unhealthy people in that industry grinding out every day. So how did you not only go, how did you get into the industry and how did you survive and thrive in it for 25 years?

Corey Hilton: Yeah. Okay. Well, um, first off I’ll say how I survived and thrived and then please remind me [00:33:00] if I forget how I got into the industry. So anyways, yeah, here we go. So how I believe that I survived and thrived was that, as I mentioned, my, my, my grandfather’s upbringing, I had lots of long walks with him and we didn’t necessarily speak on a, on a set religion.
It was more so just what was right and wrong. You know, and so when it came down to it, he didn’t speak through any book. He just basically said, okay, Corey, you know, I’m going to give you the straight up goods here. You know, you’re probably going to be out at a party or two. I’m talking when I was the young, young, you know, you tell me you’re probably gonna be at a party or two.
And he was be like, and there might be people at that party that are doing some things that aren’t necessarily legal or right. And you may be perfectly innocent in that whole situation, and you probably would be, because you’re a good kid. But at the same time, you get caught up in the middle of that, and you go down with a whole bloody group of them, right?
Maybe it’s your fault, maybe it’s not. Doesn’t really matter to them. It’s gonna happen. So he would just give me these point blank Hey man, don’t do [00:34:00] this. Right? So I wouldn’t, I, and so there was times where I, when I went through my struggles, and as I did go through some struggles, sometimes I went through struggles with addiction at one point in my life.
And when I went through that struggle and I was at rock bottom, I was a million miles away. I was down there in Florida, in Panama City Beach. I live up here in British Columbia, Canada. That’s where my folks raised me, right? So they were halfway across the continent. But when I was in my hardest times, my dad’s voice still rang in my ear.
Right? When it was that, when, when I needed him the most, he wasn’t even in front of me. It was the things that he embedded inside my head that made me realize, don’t do that. Get out of here. You’re, you’re, you’re getting, you’re in trouble, man. You know? So I used to, yes, I did get into the party scene. for sure i did but when i was in that scene i didn’t push myself to the point that i got myself in trouble with the law or got myself in a really bad bad bad situation everybody has their vices or has their stuff and i can go back in the past and dwell on it that’s not who i am anymore as a person right [00:35:00] i’ve learned i’ve grown and all that stuff so yes i had this really really good That was a solid family base that a lot of male or female dancers unfortunately don’t have and they’re out there looking for something.
Right. I already had a lot of that. So, when I was ex when when when to roll back into how I got into this whole thing, to tell you the truth, David, I was I was underage. I shouldn’t even have been in a bar at that time. Okay. So like I was going to high school and I had one of my, I was working out. As I said, I was trying to get in really good shape and I had a pretty good body at 17 years old.
I was doing all right. And so I was working out at Gold’s gym at the time and. This guy that I trained with, I kind of hung with an older crowd at that point in my life. I was trying to kind of learn and from somebody, from people. I didn’t learn all the best things at that time, but I was learning from older people.
And so this one guy that I worked out with a lot, he said to me, he says, Oh yeah, you know, I worked the door at this nightclub, Casablanca’s in New [00:36:00] Westminster. He says, why don’t you come up to the club one night and You know, uh, just come hang out, throw yourself a university shirt on and I’ll let you in the door.
So of course the club was just opening up and seven o’clock, I think, I think I took a bus there and basically walk up the stairs and I meet up with him and he says, Oh, there’s not even anybody here yet, but thanks for showing up early. It was kind of weird. It was awkward. And so then the manager walked up and he says, Oh, he says, uh, nice to meet you.
And I was like, Oh, and I just shook hands. He says, Oh, you’re a student. And I said, yeah, I’m a student. And he goes, Are you looking to make a few extra bucks? And I was like, yeah, starving student, definitely, right? And he said, okay, take your shirt off. So I took my shirt off cause there was nobody there. And all of a sudden he’s like, you’re hired Tuesdays and Thursdays.
Come here at this time, you work till 11, 1130 and you serve drinks to women and you basically collect tips and, uh, you do a little dance at the end and hand out a bottle of champagne, sound good. And just, I mean, good Lord, almost any 17 year old kid would jump all over that. So I did. And my, my folks said, Hey, like I said, [00:37:00] as long as you don’t get messed up on drugs and you keep your grades up, fill your boots, kid, have a good time.
So I did. And through that process, David, that’s where it all started. Right. But then it was like, all of a sudden I started rubbing shoulders with the best people in the industry and that were actual stripper strippers and stripped down completely nude here in Canada. And eventually started creating acts.
And eventually to the, got to the point where. I won Mr. Nude Western Canada and started traveling all over the place and I was living this crazy free bird lifestyle. It was very independent in a lot of ways. I didn’t have any backup. I didn’t necessarily, you know, it wasn’t living the same normal lifestyle that a lot of people did.
I was basically in the rock band lifestyle for a long time. But did I, did I dive into things that weren’t exactly the best at times? Yes, I did. I did. But I’m still here and I’m better than I’ve ever been now.
Yeah. And I’m not saying that in a judgmental way at all. But what I’m trying to do is frame it because we have people, we have people from all over the [00:38:00] world and cultures are so different.
There’s one race, the human race, but our cultures are so different and there are subcultures and. Obviously I wouldn’t personally strip, but I’m not going to be like, you know, you’re going to hell because the only difference between any two humans is if they choose to trust God, or if they choose not to, you know what I mean?
So, When you are stripping, you have women, even men, probably hitting on you all the time. How do you get into a relationship? How do you meet your wife? How does that come about? Do you think that affected the longevity of the marriage? Like, how does that all play? Because in my mind, it’s like, that’s a crazy lifestyle, high speed, low drag, not forming a lot of real relationships.
So how did you even Get to the point to find a wife, get married. And you said 14 years.

Corey Hilton: [00:39:00] Oh no, we were married for eight, eight years, still eight.
That’s

Corey Hilton: longer than the national average, but, uh,

David Pasqualone: well, you
know, you know that it’s seven year increments, right? Like they always say the seven, the seven year itch.
And there’s a lot of truth to that. Our bodies regenerate every seven years. And when. Along with that, our mind and our souls and everything’s changing. Um, and if we don’t watch it, it can change for the worse. So a lot of people get married, they get to seven year ish or 14 year ish or 21 year ish and then kablooey, everything blows up.
So you were the seven, what happened there? First off, how did you meet her? And then how did it work with stripping?

Corey Hilton: Sure. Yeah, I’ll go there. Um, well, first off, I wanted to say, it was interesting. You said you wouldn’t dance, but, and most people, most people wouldn’t. I’ll be honest about that. Even when I’ve been on, on my book tour, most people wouldn’t want to necessarily take all their clothes off for a living.
But I will tell you one thing that a lot of people want to know what it was like. They don’t necessarily want to do it. They didn’t kind of want to know what it was like. So that’s part of why I wrote my book. But,

David Pasqualone: and you can describe some of it now. I
mean, [00:40:00] I’m sure that if you’re on stage, there’s people that, I mean, you can literally be a preacher and have women throw themselves at you just because of the presence of authority and fame.
And then you can be a rock star and you have women throw themselves at you. And now you’re And forgive me, am I using the right term? I don’t want to be offensive in any way, shape or form, but like a male stripper, is that what it’s called? Performer? What do you phrase it?

Corey Hilton: Oh, my friend, I don’t take offense to anything. I’m saying is there like that by now, but okay. So, but now I call myself male exotic dancer.
Okay. An exotic dancer. So you’re a male exotic dancer. You’re up there. I’m sure there must be like, uh, like a surge of adrenaline rush, correct?

Corey Hilton: Oh, yeah. That’s what I did it all for.
Adrenaline was better than any drug. I loved entertaining. Entertaining is amazing, and I still do, just I’m not, I’m not of the age anymore [00:41:00] to do it. But, but I will say just to jump back where we started off with as far as how I met my ex wife, actually, it was, it was just kind of a weird dynamic, to be honest.
I was out, um, I’d done so many shows. I, you know, it was traveling all over the city. David Pasqualone, Remarkable People Podcast, Listen. Do. Repeat. For Life!. And, uh, looked over and I saw this girl sitting there right in the middle of the crowd and she just stood out to me. There was just something about her.
And so, um, it was weird, but, uh, we made eye contact and then, um, I went up and I did my, my act that night and Budweiser was actually sponsoring us. So we had these shirts that we were going to throw out into the audience at the end [00:42:00] of the show. And so we, I wrote on the shirt and stuff and all that. But when I went out to do my act, I was up on stage, did my little show, and then I would jump down in the crowd.
And it was dollar bills flying all over the place. And I jumped up onto the chair right in front of her and looked down and she was sitting there and I was just like, Oh my God, like just something about this girl. So I just, I, I leaned down and I sat on the chair and people screaming, like just losing it.
It’s the middle of ladies night. It’s just craziness. And I said, I can’t believe it, but I’ve been doing this for, Oh, well over a decade now. And I was like, you’re the one. And she was like, what do you mean? I was like, you’re the first girl in my entire career that I don’t want your money. I was like, I don’t want your money.
Put your money away. I was like, I just want to get to know you. And so that was the truth. And so we ended up getting to know each other and she was not from the, she was from a very, very poor upbringing. In fact, really rough beyond anything that I’ve ever seen really. Um, and I helped her in a way to get out of that environment and.
She ended [00:43:00] up eventually coming down to live with me in Panama City. We kind of had a, a, you know, gradual growth in our relationship, basically kind of getting to know each other, like, actually, like, more than just, you know, messing around sort of thing. And, and, you know, it was just, I had a lot of, A lot of turmoil in my life at that time, to be honest.
There was drugs involved in my life at that time. And I was, I really just wanted some stability to a certain degree. And, and we did have seven years of bliss, man. We really did. Like we had some really amazing times and, and stuff that is a really hard act to follow if you want to know the honest truth.
But, um, You know, it just really, when it came down to it, at the end of that show, I remember I had my, my shirt, I was going to throw it in the crowd and she was only four foot 10. And she, she got that shirt, all those girls out in that crowd. She jumped up and she got that shirt. She held on to that thing.
And, uh, it was just weird. It didn’t take that long. And we were getting married out on the beach out in front of Club La Vila in Panama city beach. And, uh, I think six [00:44:00] months later, we were getting married and it was like, just, it was really fast. But, you know. Again, it was one of those things that didn’t really necessarily turn out right in the end, but, but really, I can’t say that, that it’s, it’s not a really huge surprise that it didn’t turn out right because we were living a different kind of life.
Like we were just, it was a dancer life. And so when you’re traveling around from club to club, or you’re out there on the road and your girl’s at home or whatever, there’s a lot of trust that comes into play with that. Right. So believe it or not, to answer your question about. Being hard to be in a relationship with a dancer, truthfully, I believe this is just my perspective.
I believe that it’s on the dancer to actually make that other person feel comfortable being together with them. So for me, here’s a great example. I’d be doing a show that she would maybe be at. She’d be at the back of the crowd, standing there with the rest of the dancer wives, having a drink, whatever it was.
And I’d go running up with my full hula skirt worth of dollar [00:45:00] bills in my G string and I’d run up and pull all the dollar bills out and shove them in her purse and just say, love you, baby, and jump, run back into the crowd. That girl knew, like, from whether I was on the road a million miles away or whether I was right there in front of her, she knew I was all about her.
And I made that abundantly clear at all times. Even the other dancers in my group used to tell her she was the luckiest girl on the planet because she was like, I don’t know what you did to him, but he doesn’t mess around on you. Like it was just the way it was. Right. But that really, again, I believe that, you know, she loved the dancer.
She loved the entertainer. And I got out of the industry for a while. And when I got out of the industry, that’s when we actually started to fail. You know, so you’d think it was the tough part was being with the dancer. No, that was the easy part. Tough part was being with actual me, not the, not the guy that was getting all the fanfare, right?
So, you know, and I did have quite a bit of status at that time. Really, you know, it was a fun time MTV spring break, right? Like all the [00:46:00] craziness that happens down there that that used to happen down there. Um, you know, we were right, right in the thick of it, right? So when you’re being paid to entertain, bring girls into the club, all that stuff.
Yeah, of course, that’s crazy. It takes a lot of trust to be with somebody like that and not every dancer is going to be what I was. And I’m not putting myself on a pedestal, by the way. I made my mistakes. Don’t get me wrong. One mistake that I didn’t make was, is I didn’t, I didn’t make the mistake of straying, you know, and I’m still proud of that to this day.
Still am, you know, it’s not, not saying that, you know, when somebody screws around or makes a mistake that they’re, they should be banished. But because we all make mistakes, but I just know that I can sleep good at night knowing that I did the right thing.

David Pasqualone: Yeah. And I’m, for those of you watching the podcast, I want to point this out.
I keep looking at my phone. I’m not texting. There’s something wrong with my camera. So it keeps coming off Corian to me. And when I’m looking at my phone, if you notice I’m typing, I’m typing the notes of what he’s saying. [00:47:00] And one of the things you said early on in the podcast, Corey, was when you were married, you feel like you had communication, but not connection.
Or I might, forgive me if I’m phrasing that wrong. You had a great quote and you talked about how you hit it. Okay. Communication, not connection. So I don’t care if you’re a stripper or a brain surgeon or if you do septic systems or if you’re a school teacher, love God, love thy neighbor and everything comes down to action.
Doing. Like our slogan says, don’t just listen to great content, but do it, repeat each day so you can have a great life in this world and eternity to come. But the majority of what we do or the people realize it is communication. So what did you learn? So our listeners now might be struggling in a marriage and it doesn’t matter what their, they could be accountants, but what did you learn about the difference between communication and connection that you can impart this knowledge to our listeners?[00:48:00]

Corey Hilton: Well, again, it might not even be as applicable to your listeners as it was for me, because again, I, like I said, I want to come back to that again is that, that I had a really heavy disconnect, emotional disconnection issue. Okay. So like, when it came down to what my ex wife was hungry. To hear my emotions along the time.
Now, I have a really good heart. It’s not that I don’t want to, it’s just that when you’ve only been, you just know what you know. So, when I was raised that way, I acted that way as a husband as well. I acted the same way that my grandfather did, unintentionally as well. And so, I was a lot of that guy that worked, came home, Hi honey, I’m home, is dinner on the table in the year 2000, right?
And I was kind of just, There, uh, taking things for granted, uh, not telling my wife that she was beautiful, maybe not expressing myself enough, just, whether it be physically, or for that matter, mentally, or even spiritually, for that matter, at [00:49:00] times. with her and actually having more of an understanding of my partner.
I was more in my own head, just trying to be that typical guy, the brave, the bringing home the bacon guy that, uh, took this, you know, and as time goes by, sometimes we take things for granted, right? We get frustrated. Further and further into our comfort zone. And as the years went by, I didn’t take it for granted when I was a dancer because we were always having a lot of fun.
But then when I became a construction worker and I was out there slaving to the grind every day and then coming home exhausted, I didn’t, I wasn’t a whole lot of fun. And so again. Is it all her fault that we split? No, it isn’t when I look back at it all now. So again, I hate to be repetitive, but it really does come down to that awareness of your own core values and the awareness of your partner’s core values.
Whether you guys got to have them written down on your bathroom mirror so you’re reminded of them every single day. To be able to [00:50:00] do that in my eyes makes you a more authentic person and it allows them to live as a more authentic person as well. And so sometimes authenticity isn’t easy. There’s times when I’ve found that having to live by my authentic self has been a hard thing to maybe let some skeletons out of my closet, not wanting to hurt other people or wanting to word things the right way.
So I’m not hurting other people. There’s a chapter in my book that I literally called The Con Artist, The Hulk, and The Bad Apples of Good Intent. It’s because there was bad apples in my life, but they weren’t intentionally bad apples. It was just that they happened to be there in the bad times, and their intent was good, but the end result wasn’t.
And I’ve been a bad apple of good intent myself. Right. So I guess, like I say, if there’s any advice that I can pass off to anybody, and I’m not, I’m no marriage psychologist, I’ve had more failures than many have in this lifetime, but I’ve definitely learned from those in the next go round that I have where I’m not even sure who that’s going to be with.[00:51:00]
I do feel that I am more balanced. I have a better overall. I guess you could kind of say my own personal viewpoint of the person I look at in the mirror every day. The guy 10 years ago probably had a way better body, but I look in the mirror now and I love the person that I see now in the mirror because I am who I am.
I’m aware of that person and Very aware of what, what gives me negative triggers or gives me positive things in my life. And I always really try my best to live by the standard of keeping my vibration very, very high. And I’m not trying to get into a little hippy dippy stuff, but when it comes down to doing things in my life that Keep me vibing high.
I’m always trying to do that. And things that may be scrolling social media or something like that, that doesn’t give me the positive vibes, I try to get myself away from and try to keep myself in that mindset so that I’m not only living like that, but I’m also projecting that off to other people in my life as well.
Because I think that when we are in that High vibration [00:52:00] mindset, or for that matter, feeling good about ourselves, we project off that in our community, in our family, on just our household, whatever it may be. But when I was going through my divorce, I wasn’t in that high vibration mindset. Not at all. Like, the whole world was always coming down around me.
It was always everybody else’s fault. I worked my tail off. I’m not making enough money. I was complaining about something, right? So just a different time.
Yeah. And there’s a lot of truth to that. Again, some people are coming at this where they’re like vibration, no less of the devil. And then there’s people who are like, Oh, I’m going to float in.
I mean, there’s people on both sides of the spectrum and that’s both crazy. God wants us to have balance and the balance is God is energy and he created us as energy. And there is something, whether you call it the law of attraction. Um, people call it all sorts of different names. But you reap what you sow is a common biblical verse.
Enthusiasm breeds [00:53:00] enthusiasm. You know, people say stuff like that. But the fact is, if we’re being positive and we’re putting out there, we’re going to attract not what we want, but who we are. So if you’re always miserable, you’re going to attract more misery. And if you’re super positive, yeah, everything have ups and downs, but it’s going to continuously bring good into your life.
And I think, again, we could biblically support that or just. You know, through daily interactions and through daily experiences. So now let’s go back. You were in the Huh?

Corey Hilton: Oh, I was just gonna say, I think also it’s just kind of like sometimes you can manifest certain things by just being in that positive state of mind, right?
Because you’re actually willing to be bold. You’re willing to take the step out, maybe to meet the person or maybe to meet somebody in your life that, That you may not have if you were in a negative vibrational state. I have friends of mine that, you know, I have a good, good friend of mine here in town, that’s a huge David Letterman fan, and he’s very good at manifesting things.
So he actually got the opportunity before David [00:54:00] Letterman retired, he went right out to New York and actually got the opportunity to meet him and it was on set with him and everything. He got on a set, like, but how do you do that? Yes, he obviously had, you know, he was positive about what he had a goal in mind and all that, but he was bold enough to take the step because he believed in himself.
Right. He was, he was in that zone positive, not going, Oh, I can’t, or I’m just this, or I’m going to degrade my value down. And, you know, I don’t honestly, David, I said to myself before I wrote this book, who would ever want to read a book about a former male dancer? That’s there’s no value in that next thing, you know, I’m a bestseller.
Right. So I was talking to myself. Right? Like we all do it hard on ourselves sometimes. Yeah. A great episode. We had,
we had Svetlana Newsome and she talks a lot about this. So if you do want to learn more about this to our listeners, check out that episode. Fantastic episode. Um, but now Corey, let’s do this.
So we went through your life. You were [00:55:00] raised by your grandparents, call them mom and dad. Uh, you started being a male dancer even before you were 18. You made a career out of it for 25 years, but you said something very interesting, you know, you had ups and downs, you said you had some, uh, addiction issues and then whether you realize or not at the time, you were looking to fill that gap and that void from those abandonment issues.
And they, you know, you just wanted that confidence built up like we all do and would, but what made you leave stripping to go to construction? Because I’m sure that was a pay cut.

Corey Hilton: Oh, yeah. Um, it was just honestly, David, at the time, it was just, um, uh, it was, it was, I mean, I, I left the industry for a short amount of time to go into construction.
It was about a year or so. And then I, but I was still kind of doing like little side bills. It just wasn’t with my review at that time. Um, what I’m more saying is, is [00:56:00] that it was, I was, this sounds crazy, but, and again, this is just my past. This isn’t who I am now, but at the time when I. Went to the US originally.
I was brought down. I went down, crossed the border, ended up down in Florida, living this crazy lifestyle, working under the table. I wasn’t, I didn’t have a social security number at the time. Um, it was just crazy. Didn’t even have a bank account. Okay. Like, I mean, just living this lifestyle of free birding it and making money and surviving, but not really getting ahead.
Right. So when I had a little bit of a conflict, there was a conflict in our dance review where, where we had 10 guys in our group and it was just, things weren’t going well. It was just an, it was issues happening with our agent and stuff. And we were getting booked into a lot of crazy shows a bazillion miles away.
And so I just got to the point of frustration where I said, you know what, I’m out of here. And I actually, my only choices at that time [00:57:00] being an illegal alien really was one of two things, like possibly being a waiter somewhere and working under the table or going into the construction industry. And so construction was just what it was.
It was like, I was literally forced into it. So yeah. Like, do you think I was happy? Not really. Um, it changed me as a person. Right. So again, and that reflected on my relationship too. Right. So, but at the same time, I learned how to be a pretty good tile setter, but the same, but it didn’t, I can, I can lay some tile, but, uh, it’s not really the industry I want to be in anymore.
That’s for sure. But no, it was, you know, learning and growing. It was just another, it was a humbling experience. Let’s just put it that way.

David Pasqualone: Yeah, from on stage to on the floor and you know, you’re it’s tough. It’s tough. Yes. That’s what I’m saying. Yeah. I remember doing construction and demolition and, um, even [00:58:00] working remodeling houses and doing landscaping and seeing these people aren’t better than me.
I’m not better than them, 15 bucks an hour and they’re living in a mansion. And I’m like, yeah, I need to do something with my life. Not that there’s anything wrong with doing landscaping, but no, that wasn’t where I knew I was supposed to be. There was more to it and I was just settling. So, you know, for you listening, if you’re love landscaping, and I know a lot of rich landscapers, I mean, they can make some bank money.
So I’m not saying you’re poor if you’re a landscaper, but what I’m saying is do what you love, do what you’re passionate about, do what your purpose is, do what God called you to do. And that just wasn’t my calling. But when you’re going from the entertainment and the high adrenaline and now you’re laying tile floor, good skill for you to learn for your next house.
But probably not the best for your ego, right? So you’re going [00:59:00] through your life.

Corey Hilton: The ego got damaged.
Yeah. So between what we’ve discussed and today, is there anything else we’ve skipped in your story or anything significant that you want to cover? Before we go into where is Corey today and where are you heading?

Corey Hilton: Yeah. I mean, I guess all I can say is this, you know, um, and, and look, I, I, I’ve been wrong so many times in my life and I’ve had so many failures in my life and I’ve learned so many times from so many of those things because, because really what it came down to David is, is that I was really looking through a bit of a tunnel vision on certain things.
Um, Not really being open to other people’s perspectives a lot of the time, especially when I disagreed with them, I kind of just thought, I’m right, they’re wrong. Um, and what really was a change for me with that was, is opening myself up to other cultures, um, going and traveling the world, going to the Philippines, going to Indonesia, getting to [01:00:00] know how other people lived and what made other people happy in this world.
And what I defined as happiness here in North America wasn’t exactly right. You know, um, being real about it, you know, um, uh, we, we tend to, no, I’m not, I don’t know about where you’re at, but where I’m at, we tend to be keeping up with the Joneses a lot here, trying to, who, he who dies with the most toys wins kind of attitude.
And, you know, when I went to the Philippines, I was in the Siargao and, Riding around in a scooter and buying chicken skewers off of people on the side of the road that had no teeth in their mouths and they look back into the field behind them where the kids were playing and the kids are having fun and those people with no teeth were smiling bigger smiles than anybody I’ve ever seen before.
And they were happy. They were really truly happy. Right? And at the same time, I was, I would, you know, took my scooter back to town, got on a Wi Fi connection, jumped onto Facebook and saw everybody, um, hoarding [01:01:00] toilet paper over here at the beginning of the pandemic, right? And so you, you see a, a massive, massive difference in, in just the way that, They treated each other there, you know, and so I, the way that I kind of see it is, is that I can’t control the world.
I can’t control what’s going on out there, but what I can control is the way that I represent myself, how I, um, can pass on the knowledge that I can to other people to be able to do the exact same thing for themselves. And by doing that, The only word that I can use for it all is liberation because what I mean by that is, is that it’s, it’s liberated me from a little bit of a prison cell that I had in my own head, believing that this was what life was supposed to be.
This was what I was, what was supposed to be to make me happy as a person. And I was wrong. Uh, it wasn’t about who had the most toys or had the most [01:02:00] money. I need money to live. I mean, everybody needs money to live, but it was more about making an impact, right? Like when I, when I help other authors out now, or just other people out in general, just to be able to say, you know, hey, I You know, maybe try this.
I’m not telling you what to do. Just maybe try this and it works for them. That’s really gratifying, you know? And so, um, that’s what makes me want to get up every day to get out of bed. Really it does. And, and, and it has a lot to do with writing now. Writing’s a big thing for me and coaching other people.
It’s, it’s, it’s a massive thing for me. And if I could do that as my full time position for the rest of my life. I’d be a pretty happy guy. I really would, you know, I’d be happy with that.
Where’s Corey today and where are you heading so we can help you get there?

Corey Hilton: Yeah. Thanks for asking. Actually. Um, you know, without sounding like I’m trying to just pitch and plug and sales pitch everything, I’ll just be straightforward.
So. I mean, I wrote this book. It’s done really, really well. [01:03:00] Um, I can, you know, obviously I’m into when people buy a book, it’s, it’s very appreciated because they’re, they’re hearing my life story and they’re, they’re getting some amazing messages out of that life story as well. Cause every single chapter in my book has a core value that’s addressed in it and a struggle that, that I had with that core value and it’s highlighted throughout the book.
So it is really focused on men who struggled over 30, who struggled with lack, unworthiness and emotional disconnection, all those great things that I struggled with. But at the end of the day, it’s not about selling books for me anymore. It really isn’t. Like, there’s only so much in that. And so, in this last little while, I’ve had the, the fortune to be able to, um, not only work really, really tightly with my amazing publisher and, and coach, Diana Ryers out in Ontario, but the great, the sad slash great thing that happened was, is unfortunately, Diana and her husband aren’t in the best of health now.
And she had to actually, um, Kind of move on from doing what she was doing. So she’s handed her publishing company and her staff over to me. So now I actually have an [01:04:00] editor. I have a, um, typesetter and I have basically, um, um, all the components, the editor, typesetter, cover designer, everybody did that in the process of writing a book.
So what we do now is, is we help with the 10 week coaching process to be able to help people write a book. And then from there, it goes through all those phases. And at the end, it goes through an Amazon launch, which I assist them with as well. And we have a hundred percent hit rate for people hitting the top 10 on Amazon now by using this systematic process.
So where I’m going with this now is I’m just bringing on new authors. And I have actually a list of about five or six in this next couple of months that are starting their process of writing their memoirs with me. And that’s exciting. Because when people write their memoirs, they’re actually getting right down to their true authenticity.
And as hard as that is to do, it really does help people to actually live by their truth. Because when you’ve actually wrote it down and let it be known to the world, there’s no going back. There isn’t. I wanted to hide under the covers when I released my book because I was like, [01:05:00] Oh my God, what is everybody going to think of me?
Well, guess what? I started actually realizing it doesn’t matter what anybody thinks of me anymore. I’m not out here to serve the whole world. I can only control who I can in my own bubble or what I can in my own bubble. And if that rubs off on other people and gives them something good out of life, that’s awesome, but it’s not going to be for everybody, right?
I’m not about trying to, you know, I don’t sit there and worry as much as I used to about all the things that are going bad in the world. I actually just kind of go, okay, this is what I can do. And I go do it. You know, and that’s, that’s that it said in a nutshell. So yeah, where I’m at, it’s TakeItOff Publishing now.
And my company, uh, is basically just, just really coming off the ground right now, which is really cool. And that’s why I really appreciate you having me on and, uh, you know, it’s TakeItOff. ca is my web web address. So you can go there and just see my intro video. It’s basically just describing my employees that I have with my company now, and you can obviously purchase the book and the, the book.
And the, uh, the, uh, Kindle copy on there as well. But, but it’s not really all about the book anymore. The book was a launchpad for the career. This is a [01:06:00] career that I really know I can love for the long term. So yeah, that’s where I’m kind of going.
Excellent, Corey. It’s been great hanging out with you today.
And my question, I was just going to say, so what’s the best way for people to reach you? So of course, we’ll put links in the show notes, but you already threw that out there. Um, last question. No, that’s fantastic. If there’s anything else we missed in your life, let’s talk about it before Conclude the episode, but if you feel like we covered everything well, if you had one parting thought to leave with our audience, what would that be?
Corey Hilton: Well, if you wanted to talk about the things in my life, we could be here for another couple of days because there’s way too many stories. But that you can read the book for, um, and anybody can read that book, by the way, as well. It doesn’t, it’s not driven off of any political or religious ideology. It’s not even written that way.
It’s just a really easy to read book that just tells my story is all it is. It’s, it’s not, it’s not [01:07:00] too crazy, but the one thing that I will say is it’s not, but everybody that’s read it has said the same thing. It’s not what I expected. It isn’t what I was thinking it was going to be. It’s not all about the stripper stuff.
It’s actually a lot to do with relationships and struggle with relationships because. You know, that’s something that we all kind of have. That’s why the divorce rate’s so high in some ways, I guess. But no, I think that again, just the takeaway from, from this, if, if anybody that’s gotten to this point in this podcast is, is that, you know, I know that Elvis, you use the old, you know, line, the truth will set you free.
But there is an element of that that is so real. Because, like, when I actually started speaking that truth, when I went and, I guess, you know, admitted to some of these things, and I said, I even admitted to, like, saying that I controlled my wife at one point. It wasn’t easy for me. I didn’t want to be the guy that was controlling someone else, but there was a point where I was, and she wanted control.
As crazy as that sounds at that point, right? But I had [01:08:00] to go back and actually admit to that. And I even admitted it to her and she kind of said, who am I talking to right now? Um, but that just doing those things and being authentic and actually being you and being aware of that stuff. Man, it’s just like, it’s, there’s no price that can be put on that, you know, there just isn’t to me.
So I, there’s anything I can give to your audiences is just, again, it’s just, I know you, some of you probably already out there doing it, but write down those values, write down those feelings that you, that, that those values, the, the, the value word is, is, you know, unity, for example, if that’s your value word, one of your things that you, you’ve, you’re very strong on a core value of unity.
Get the feeling beside that makes you feel like, I mean, for me, it gives me ease when I’m united with other people. So for, or just the core value of unity gives me a feeling of ease. By having those things there, you can, I mean, I promise you, [01:09:00] if you write those down and you see them every single day, you can connect those dots.
When things are going off kilter, when you’re having a really bad day or things aren’t working out. There’s a reason why there’s road rage out there, my friends. It’s not about the guy that cut you off in the car that’s in front of you. It’s probably about something that happened back at your house that you’re going through right now.
And you need to be aware of it. And if you don’t, you’re probably going to end up with a fight at the guy on the other end of the bridge that just cuts you off and he has no idea why. So I’m just saying, if I can, if there’s one thing I can, I wish that I could do for, for everyone out there in this tribal world that we’re living in right now, to a certain degree, is just to be able to have more of an understanding of other people and respect their perspectives on things.
They may be right in your mind and they may be wrong, but just try to understand each other a little bit more, you know.

David Pasqualone: Awesome, Corey. It’s been great hanging out with you today. Getting to know you. Um, again, if someone wants to continue the conversation, [01:10:00] get coaching, talk to you about publishing, what’s the best way to reach you out of the multiple social media channels?
Is there one that’s better?

Corey Hilton: Yeah. I mean, obviously I hate to use the old FB, but Facebook is one. Uh, you can catch me at, um, Uh, it would be Take It Off Publishing and Authenticity. Coaching is my actual, uh, page name. Um, obviously Corey Hilton, C O R E Y H I L T O N in British Columbia. You can contact me there, but the best place really is on my website.
Go to takeitoff. ca and you hit the chat on there. You can ask me any question that you want to. It comes straight to my cell phone and it’s not a robot. It’s actually me. So yeah, that’s the best place to contact me is on the site for sure.

David Pasqualone: Well, Corey, thanks for being here today. To our listeners.
Hopefully you heard a lot of good knowledge, and now you can take it and you apply it to your life, because all the truth in the world is amazing and wonderful. And like Corey just said in another Bible verse he closed with, [01:11:00] the truth shall set you free. It’s true, but if you don’t apply it It doesn’t matter.
And money is a tool. So nothing wrong with having money, but it’s just a tool. It can’t buy you love and joy and peace. So listen to Corey, check out his book, um, check out, you know, his company, if you’re looking to publish a book. And then from there, we hope to see you in the next episode. We hope to hear about your remarkable journey and your growth and share it with your friends and family.
Not because we want to be popular, But because we want to help you as much as we can. So I’m David Pasqualone. This was our friend Corey Hilton. Corey, thanks again, brother.

Corey Hilton: You’re the
best, man.

David Pasqualone: All right. Have a great day and see you in the next episode. Ciao.