Debby Kruszewski | Everything Happens for a Reason, Breaking Negative Cycles, & Feeling Joy ♾️

Faith, Angels, 9/11, cheerleaders…  all this and more right now!

 INTRO MUSIC AND VIDEO

Hello, my Remarkable friend. I’m David Pasqualone, and welcome to the Remarkable People Podcast. This week we have a very special guest, and if you’re a first time listener or if you’ve been with us since day one or listened through all 150 plus episodes, we are here because we have two objectives. One, to [00:01:00] help you grow, thrive, and succeed in life.

And two to glorify God. So when you’re here today, know that’s the mindset we have As you listen to our guest’s story. We don’t just discuss what they’re able to overachieve, overcome, or achieve, but we break it down the practical steps of how they did it. So you can too. So as you listen to today’s Remarkable story, Keep that in mind.

Stay with us through the whole episode, not just to get the special offer at the end, which is really cool and kind of our, of our guest, but stay with it because, yeah, the beginning might be preliminary, but there might be a gold nugget, and then you may stay two thirds through and it’s like, wow, this is literally something I never fully understood, or it just clicked and it changed my life forever.

All because you gave the podcast an extra five minutes. A 45 minute hour podcast or two hour podcast, that could [00:02:00] change your life. Totally worth it cuz we don’t just have guests on here that talk about how great they are, but they talk about how great God is and how much he loves you. And even if you’re not a believer, the same principles that work for them and me work for you too.

So at this time, we have a very special guest, Debbie Krause. If I said your name wrong, Debbie, please forgive me. But ladies and gentlemen, the story’s the same. She’s gonna talk about faith, she’s gonna talk about September 11th. She’s gonna talk about the impact that had on her life. She’s gonna talk about how she has these expectations and delusions of grandeur and how when they didn’t realize she was like, and she got a little low, but she teaches us how to change our mindset, how to use the law of attraction or you reap what you so principle, however your, your worldview is.

But she teaches us how [00:03:00] to get out of these bad cycles, how to recognize emotional triggers that change our whole perspective so we can get new cycles and we can avoid the bad. And thrive in the good so we can feel peace and joy. So I don’t know about you, but I can definitely use this episode. So take the episode, please like it, please share it with your friends and family.

Please check out the book because our book, Remarkable People Volume One, takes guests like Debbie. and then there, those 12 guests have a chapter each, and they cover a topic each that’s laser focused. So now you can only hear their story, but you can read it too. So check out the podcast, check out the episodes that’ll help you grow.

Through the visual form on YouTube and rumble through the audio form on the podcast director you love. Whether it’s Spotify or Apple or Google Podcast, check out the book [00:04:00] if you’re a reader. And then more than anything, don’t just listen to this content, but do it. Repeat it so you can have a great life in this world, and most importantly, eternity to come.

So ladies and gentlemen, get ready for our friend Debbie Kazuki now.

[00:04:21] Copy of INTERVIEW Debby Kruszewski Realizing Everything Happens for a Reason Breaking Negative Cycles and Feeli: Hey Debbie, how are you today? I’m great, Dave. How are you? I’m awesome. I’m awesome. So I was just telling our listeners a little bit about you, kind of an overview of what to expect in this episode and whether they’re a first time listener or whether they’ve just listened since day one and, and hit every episode in a row.

What this podcast is about is you sharing your. , the highs, the lows, the good, the bad, the ugly, everything in between. Just everything that’s happened to you in life is what makes you who you are today. So we know we’re gonna get a lot of gold nuggets along the way. We’re gonna [00:05:00] have a lot of time to spend together.

But at the end of this episode, if the listeners can be guaranteed, they’re gonna walk away with one key concept that they can apply to their life. What is that? What are they gonna get in your episode? Just one main. There’s no mistakes, there’s no coincidences. God divinely made you for the perfect person that you are, and he just wants to put everything in your path that will get you to your dreams cuz they’re divinely made just for you.

Awesome. So ladies and gentlemen, There are no accidents. Debbie’s gonna talk to you about that with this hour, and you’re gonna get a whole lot more. I’m sure that not only what she was able to overcome or achieve in life, but we’re gonna break it down the practical steps of how she did it. So you can too.

And I can too. Everybody can. So Debbie, at this time, let’s talk about your origins. Where are you from? What was your upbringing Life? Stable home, crazy home. Brothers, [00:06:00] sisters, aunts, uncles. What? What’s the. I live in Maec, New York, which is outside of Manhattan. We could be in the city in about 25 minutes.

And I’m an only child, so my home life was, you know pretty normal. I think parents still married. I think they were at 54 years at this point. And beautiful. Yeah. Lived in a house of faith, which was, you know, has molded me and made me who I, who I am today. I am close with. A lot of my aunts and uncles and cousins, and a lot of them live in Long Island or in New Jersey, and, you know I think we all are very faithful and live a, live a life in God, which, you know, again, like, you know, God always puts the right people in your path For sure.

So I’m very grateful for all. Good. So for the [00:07:00] most part, your upbringing, the first, you know, your childhood days, your teenage years, anything Remarkable or significant that happened in that that contributed to the forming of who you are today? Or was it all pretty consistent? Good laid foundation? I mean, I think, you know, I learned a lot about my faith very, very young.

I always had very strong faith. I know that I came here. straight from another life. And, you know, I’ve been sort of been guided that way to learn more about that. But you know, I, I had angels speaking to me when I was really young and I had no idea what that was all about or understood. And a lot of people around me just didn’t get it.

And, you know, oh, that was just a crazy dream. Or, oh, you’re. Cute. Like thinking all of these crazy things are happening to me. But they were all spiritual and divine things and you [00:08:00] know, I think that there are so many things that have happened and, and I think more significantly from going into high school and college.

We just had some family issues at that time and you know, it was, it was like, okay. , you know, we’re a family and, and we have to stick together. So I, I felt very strong to my family at that time of being an understanding and contributor. And I, and I knew that faith had driven, driven me and kept, kept me there.

And when my friends were falling out of faith or really just never had faith, my very, very close friends did. So it wasn’t abnormal to, to. You know, go to mass every weekend. You know, I didn’t have that problem. And even people that weren’t faithful were very supportive of me for that. So I, I definitely know that I had some really random things in life where you’re like, I don’t understand what, why this is.[00:09:00]

And for instance, like gradu, after I graduate, after I graduated college, I started a job literally that Monday and. It was a 24 7 operation and I ended up working four to midnight and it was always like, why can’t I get a normal job? And, you know, I was applying to get out of there and, and I just, for whatever reason, I couldn’t and I couldn’t get out of that time that, that shift.

It was really hard. And then, you know, September 11th came and I had worked, you know, the night before I’d worked from four my shift at 4:00 PM and I worked until the middle of the night. So I didn’t get home from work till like three, four o’clock in the morning and I was sleeping. . And you know, my phone is going off like the house phone, my cell phone of like, are you, are you home?

Where are you? What’s going on? You know, like you’ve gotta turn on the tv. You gotta turn on tv. And finally I heard my dad on the Ho, on the Homeline. He had called a bunch of [00:10:00] times and he’s like, Trish, turn on the TV and call me. And I turned on the TV and I worked in downtown Manhattan, and I’m like, that is why I worked for the midnight all this time.

And you know, you just, you’re always. It’s moments like that where it’s like there’s a reason, there was a complete reason, and that day was that reason of of me not being in the city. And you, once you start to recognize those big things, you start to really recognize bigger things and everyday things.

And it, it really helps to mold a lot of your frustration. . You know, today, sometimes I just laugh when I’m like, really? How come that didn’t work out? But you know, you don’t, you don’t know why. And then you may never know, but it, you know, if you can learn how to navigate through some of those lessons of remember that day, just remember that day.

Remember how God protected you that day. He’s protecting you today. You know? So, [00:11:00] All the challenges in life, I just try to realize they’re just a storm of dust and you just have to surrender to God and say, you know, God, I trust in you and I know you’re taking care of me, and I know you’re handling it, and I, I keep trying to take it back from you , and handle it myself.

But you know, I, I, I definitely. That those times were really important. And I think it does start with your family of just know that God is always in charge and, you know, just always go to church and just always ask God for help. And those are just important lessons that I, that I’ve always stuck with and it hasn’t failed me yet.

So. Yeah. And that’s one of the things I was gonna ask you. We don’t need to go into the details of what happened in your teenage years, but this show is about total transparency and you can openly share whatever you’d like. But when your faith was challenged, like, God, how are you allowing this to happen?

What’s going on? You mentioned that you were surrounded by [00:12:00] other like-minded friends. So for people, whether they’re a teenager, a child, an adult, even a. , what are the things you suggest people do? Because we’re all gonna have highs and we’re all gonna have lows, and the journey in between is never easy, right?

Mm-hmm. . So what do you suggest that people do on an everyday basis to insulate themselves? Not isolate themselves from the world, cuz that’s impossible, but to insulate themselves. So when bad things come, they’re flameproof. Right. So one thing that I like to tell tell people is, you know, life, a heartbeat goes like this on purpose.

It goes up and it goes down, and it goes up and it goes down. And that’s, you know, our, our cycles of life is, there’s enough and there’s a down. So you kind of have, we’re all paying attention to our cycles if we realize it or not. Like you have these amazing, great times and. , then you have, oh my gosh, you get that one phone call of, you know, somebody passed away and then, you know, there’s a windstorm of some bad news [00:13:00] that comes, but you know that it’s a storm.

So there’s this, everybody, everything in life has a season and there’s gonna be good and there’s gonna be bad. And when you’re in those bad seasons, You have to stay in that trust of like, I trust that God did all these good things for me. I trust that while I’m in this time, God is with me. I trust that I can get through this because God put me in this storm for some reason.

It’s getting me ready for the next thing. It’s preparing me. It’s rebinding me away from something bad and to pay attention to. The signs that he’s giving you, because if you know it or not, you are surrounded by. A team, you know? So you have your angels, your guardian angels, and God gave that to you, and God is with you too, you know, and they’re all just an expression of God.

So I always look at it like everywhere you go, [00:14:00] just picture like that. You know, you’re coming down the tunnel, getting ready to go on the field, and there’s all these people like, yeah, so this is great. And that is with you all the time, you know? So just when you’re in that bad season, , that’s when you turn to God, you know?

And you should be turning to God even in the good season. But when you are like, I trust you, God, I know that there’s a reason and I know you’re gonna help me through this and I can do this with you. And you know, you, there’s seasons where you just, you have no choice but to get through it. And you know, my.

Thing is you, there’s things you can’t walk away from. So let’s say you break your leg, right? You can’t walk away from a broken leg. You have to deal with that. You have to sit through the pain. You might have to have surgery, you have to go through the healing process. You don’t have a choice. You can’t walk away from that.

And so much of life is, you can’t walk away from that. But how are you gonna handle it? Well, you could sit around and [00:15:00] cry the whole time. And is that gonna help your healing? or you could be grateful and you could say, well, I’m gonna get stronger. I’m gonna use this time to learn a new skill. Like I’m gonna do more reading.

I’m gonna take a course online. I’m gonna do exercise up on my upper body strength at this time. And the more that you praise God in those moments, the quicker you will heal. And one of my favorite stories is Dodi Olstein. They told her she had stage four cancer in the eighties and she laughed at them and she’s like, I’m going to laugh through all this cuz I am gonna live and it’s 2023 and she’s still telling that story today.

So it’s, it’s really how you treat the storm. And if you curse it, you know, cursing it is inviting the evil. Be like, oh no, you’re in charge. No, please come, come and sit with me and you take care of it, not God. You know, and you’re inviting and asking it to stay and to fester and to grow. But if you’re like, Nope, this doesn’t belong to [00:16:00] me.

This is just a season. I’m gonna get through it cuz God is gonna help me through it. And God is holding my hand and he gave me all of these signs to show me that I will get through it. He put me here for a reason to perseve, persevere, . Hope I said that right. , persevere. Sorry, . And I am going to do it because God is with me and God is holding my hand, and there’s nothing more better than a victory with God.

Amen. Amen to that. So on your story and through your journey, you get to that September 11th moment where almost everybody I know can tell you exactly where they were at that day or time. It just was so shocking and impactful to our lives. And for you, it was a realization like, wow, maybe this is why I could never get off Second shift.

And what happened with your life, your mindset, and where did you go from? . Well, you know, I will take myself back to that time [00:17:00] and when we were actually allowed to go. Cuz you couldn’t go past 14th street for a a long while. And when we were actually allowed to go back to work, I take the West Side Highway.

I had to drive because of the weird times that I worked. And it was just exactly what I said, that team of cheerleaders, there was people all across the West Side Highway just cheering. on, and it was the most beautiful thing. I like gonna get all teared up. It was so beautiful. And you are like, I, I am so grateful to be part of this community, to be part of this world and I’m, I’m just grateful that there are people that I am surrounded by that I don’t even know that have that love for.

Life, that love for the country, that love for each other to cheer each other on and to be there for each other. And that was so beautiful and [00:18:00] you really, really got that opportunity to say, you know, I could do all things through Christ that strengthened me. And I think we all sh got really strong during that time.

And it did make me realize the value of my life of I’m going back to school, I’m getting my M B A, I’m getting to further my career. and I, there’s no reason why I can’t make that happen, and I did, and I ended up getting my M B A. I ended up leaving and moving my way in my career and trying really hard to embrace life as best as I could.

I don’t, I don’t. . I really pushed myself a lot during that time cuz I did have very strong goals of things I wanted to accomplish. And I, and I, I believe I accomplished a lot of them. I don’t think I accomplished all of them, but, you know, I fell on my face a million times and I, I got back up and I kept going.

And I think that if I, you know, I could have sat and dwelled and I [00:19:00] think that, that for me, . Just seeing how fast life can change and how fast your life can be, can be taken away from you. It helped me to just keep moving and I, I don’t , you know, I hope not. Everybody’s life lesson is so harsh, but you know, we, we just hit a one year of the war in Ukraine and you’re like, these people are in a storm and one day they woke up and you know, they were being bombed.

And that could happen here in a. , you know, you have to appreciate and love every day. And if you, you know, you do your best to put your all into it. And that, those are the lessons that I’ve, I’ve learned through that time. And when it comes to goal setting, you know, people who are good at something, they just take it for granted.

They think everybody thinks that way, but to actually set goals and achieve goals and stay, keep that perseverance along the way. What’s your mindset? Describe, how does Debbie think about. I think about, I’m a big [00:20:00] picture thinker and I like to sort of scale it down. So I believe that you were given a dream in your heart.

I believe you were giving skills and passions for a reason. And so I think goals are just little milestones that you need to get there. And people that think that their dreams are untouchable or. Oh, that’s never gonna happen. All you’re doing is pushing it further away, and you’re using vices that are against your, your big dream, because you’re like, well, I’m just trying to get through the moment.

Like, oh, I’m fat. What’s another cheeseburger? Or, you know, who cares? Let’s supersize it. You know? Oh, oh, I can’t do this unless I’m skinny. It’s like, no, stop, stop, stop, stop. Think of the big dream, and if your big dream is to climb Kilimanjaro, , you know, you’re five two and you weigh O over 300 pounds. That’s, you know, doesn’t really sound

That’s dream is very viable. , if that’s [00:21:00] what you’re dreaming, you wanna do it. You’re like, okay, well I’m gonna start walking and I’m gonna take my walking to maybe running, and then I’m gonna start to learn how to hike. And then I’m gonna learn that, you know, I need to strength build my strength. So I’m gonna get myself into the gym, and then I’m gonna start eating better.

And then I’m gonna build myself to be ready to Kai kill Manjaro. I now, I’m gonna, and you know the, you start small and you keep moving and you keep moving and you keep moving and then you see how attainable it is. And then it’s like, well what’s my next dream? And what, what can I do next? If I could do this, what is next?

And I think we get stuck in the, I can’t, right at the beginning of the gate, cuz it feels impossible, but it’s not. And there’s so many people around you that are watching you. We’re all watching each other. and we all are cheerleaders for each other. And yeah, we all dream crush each other too of, no, you can’t do that.

But you know what? When they start watching you do it, all of a [00:22:00] sudden they start looking at their dreams and they start looking at their goals and they wanna make changes. So being a cheerleader for you becomes their goals and dreams starts to get built. Their goals and dreams start to get accomplished.

and then you realize you need a village. You know, we all need each other to help each other and to cheerlead each other on. And you know, one, it’s a contagious and it’s a beautiful contagious. I’d rather people be supporting and loving each other cuz that spreads so fast. But we spend so much time.

Bringing each other down and, and you know, if we all start together, we start our own little community and then if you’re following it and you’re doing it, your community grows and it grows and it grows. And that’s where we should be focused. And you know, that’s part of my goal is to just really help people follow their dreams and love themselves and trust that God gave it to them for a reason and build their dream team and build their community.

And it just starts at one person [00:23:00] at a time. And it that it really. Effective and makes a difference. Yeah, I couldn’t agree more. And you know, any secular management study will show you that the best leadership has 12 people they manage. Right? Hmm. That sounds familiar. Jesus and the disciples, right? They changed the world.

They changed the world, and it just started with. . Jesus went off to these 12 and then went throughout the whole world to where we are today. So yeah, I couldn’t agree with you more. So what are the things that, again, we wanna go chronologically through your story, and I don’t wanna miss anything or skip around, but after you went back to school and you got your degree, where did your life go from there?

And then we’re gonna transition to you. How do you keep a passion? . So after I graduated to get my mba, I did go through a huge stage of frustration and upset because it was like I thought, you know, you get the degree and then all of a sudden all [00:24:00] these, everyone’s like, oh, I wanna hire you. Oh, of course

And that didn’t happen. And I was mad at everybody I worked with. because I was like, I, you know, I worked really hard to get my M B A and you know, I’m still here and this job, I hate this job. But, so I was learning the law of attraction of like, I was sitting in it and hating it and it was just drawing me deeper into it instead of praising it.

So, you know, the right opportunity came at the right time and, Finally got that call of We’re really interested in you and you are perfect. And it, it was literally mine. I mean, I walked in the door and I was there 10 minutes and we’re all handshaking and you know, cheers cheering champagne. It was really like, The perfect storm and you know, I learned a lot and I was able to move to the next level, to the next place, [00:25:00] and then to the next place.

And I worked my way all the way up the corporate ladder to learn that, wait a second, this isn’t . This isn’t my dream at all. This is somebody else’s dream. and I, I learned that because there was a level of greed in it, there was a level of, oh, I have to chase this title and that title will bring me the money and the money is going to change everything for me.

Cause I was always told the more money will bring, bring you all this happiness for stuff. And all it was was it turned people around me. Ugly. It turned myself ugly. I was wasting a lot of money and I was miserable. I was miserable all day, every day. And I realized that if I kept this trail up, that I was gonna die.

And. I was asking God for help. I’m like, I, I, I feel like I’m gonna have a heart attack or a stroke or something, and I’m just gonna die by [00:26:00] doing this. This isn’t right. This isn’t what I’m brought here for. I was chasing something that was ugly. I was chasing dollars and that made me an ugly person, and I didn’t like who I was when I looked in the mirror.

So I. Ask God for help. And he said, I want you to leave. I just leave and I want you to start writing and I will take care of everything. And I did. And I left and I wrote three books in nine months, and I didn’t really know. Any rhyme or reason of what they were, what was gonna happen to them, if they would, you know, become bestsellers or, you know, they would have a life of their own where they’re gonna become a movie or a series.

And I sort of, again, went through another struggle of I wasted all this time. I, you know, I, I did what God told me and now what? And, you know, and, and [00:27:00] I was so mad and. , every time I walk away from writing things go bad. And you know, I, I’ve learned to do a lot of deep meditation and prayer, which I believe those hard times were brought to me because, , I, I needed to go into those deep moments of prayer and meditation and, you know, I was like, God, I don’t understand.

Like I wrote these books and now like I wanna do all these other things. And he’s like, I just told you to write. I didn’t tell you to do all these other things I told you to write. And he’s like, just listen to me and trust me. And I’m like, you are. All right. So I went back to writing. and you know, there’s no coincidences and there’s no mistakes.

And once you realize that, it gets you somewhere. So I’ve been writing and working on other novels and then all of a sudden you get that phone call of, I really could use you on my team. I need help. And what that is, is, is a [00:28:00] company that’s a, a media company. Is revamping themselves something I know how to do that needed help with some content and fundraising, which I know how to do.

And now I’m changing my books into screenplays and we’re pitching to investors to make them into movies. So, you know, it’s just trusting God and staying in that mindset and asking for help and guidance and, You know, why did you ask me to write God? I don’t know. I didn’t go in, you know, ever think I was gonna be a writer.

I, I enjoyed it from time to time in, in high school and college, but, you know, I never thought more than that. And you know, now I’m getting an audience of people that are like, you helped me through this bad time by reading your book or. I really never knew how to look at God that way, or, you know, really understand the guidance of always being loved and protected by God and that that was a goal that I didn’t even know I [00:29:00] had.

I didn’t know that I was writing in such faith and trust. , I just knew what was in my heart and I was just talking what was in my heart, and it is about trusting God and they all, you know, turn into a direction that they need to because God has guided them. So I’m grateful because I didn’t really see it that way.

But once I let God tell me where I need to be and where what I need to do, everything changed. Yeah. It’s amazing how that works, right, . And we just kind of let go, but continue to move forward. Everything flows the way it should. Yes. So, yeah. That’s fantastic, Debbie. So there are people who, you know, I’ve heard it said repeatedly that 70% plus of the population hates their career and their job.

So a lot of people are listening to you and they’re like, yeah, I know exactly where you’re. And then you mentioned how what you dwell on is where you [00:30:00] stay, what some people call it, the secret, the law of attraction. You reap what you sow, you know, the, the same concepts out. But I believe that God’s a creator of all the Bible’s.

True. And that premise for what people call the law of attraction is in the Bible. You know, you reap what you sow and you know, and as a man thinking, so is he. And there’s so many concept. So for the people who are stuck, maybe they lost a loved one. Maybe they were just betrayed in a messy divorce. Maybe their child is sick, maybe they’re going bankrupt.

What kind of. Instruction. Do you give those people to help them dig out of the hole and to just come into that abundant just grace? Like even if you’re poor, you can still have peace and joy, even if you’re sick. You can still have peace and joy, even if you’re in a horrible situation like a prisoner of war.

Hopefully nobody is, but it, it’s real. Still to this day, someone can still have peace and joy even though they’re not happy and having fun. Right. . [00:31:00] So what do you say to those people listening who are in a bad place to turn their situation around and at least find that peace and joy? Yeah, and I so badly wanna , wish I could quote directly, but the story of John McCain and how he, he got through being a prisoner of war, and I’m not gonna eloquently be able to do it, say it, because I don’t remember it.

I read it such a long time ago. But it, it took me back to that. One of the great things that I’ve learned in learning about meditation and becoming a meditation coach is there’s every moment is a new moment, right? So you’re in this moment and now it’s gone, and now there is a new moment, moment, and now it’s gone.

You know, and if you ju if you can go in and just sometimes just say that to. , you realize you’re, you’re surviving something. You thought you couldn’t survive, and you, now it’s five [00:32:00] minutes. Now it’s 10 minutes. Now it’s an hour. And you look at all, all of those moments before that you’re in this storm and now you’re deeper through it and you survived it.

And you know, it’s, it’s a, again, a heartbeat. So you’re in the darkness, you’re down in the trenches, you’re on your way. and if you look at your journey and where you’ve come from and how much you’ve grown and you give it gratitude, you know, if your child is sick, I mean, I can’t think of anything so horrifying and you know, I think it’s almost everybody’s worst nightmare, you know, glorifying God in those moments it sounds like, you know, a lot of people will be like, Who are you?

You know, you don’t understand. I, I, I, and I get that. But if, you know, like there’s, there’s a team of people that are caring for your child. There’s nurses, there’s [00:33:00] doctors, there’s prayers, there’s so much you could do in a prayer. And a a, one thing that my one of my prayer groups we’ve been focused on in the past few weeks has been praying for souls and purgatory.

you know, being in a bad situation, it feels impossible. And you’re like, I, I feel helpless and I don’t know what to do, but God, I know that you’re gonna get me through this storm and I wanna take this pain for somebody in purgatory. And all, you know, you can feel such a release once you say those prayers.

A and you see things turn around, you know, and it’s, there’s a. That you could do with prayer, and it cha you may not feel it in that moment. You, you know, sometimes it, it feels like impossible. And they’re like, I’ve already said a million prayers. Mother Teresa will say, well, then say more. [00:34:00] You know, if you don’t have time to pray, then you should make, you should pray, you should pray more.

You know, you, you, it really changes everything. But there’s also techniques too. Anxiety that gets in the way. And you know, there’s ways of getting through those moments. So it’s like something you could touch, something you could see something you could smell, do it again, you know, and you know, it changes your mind cuz your mind is in a loop and it only gravitates to the two 20,000 memories that it.

it can touch. So you have to change the focus of like, okay, here comes the loop again. Like, how many times have you been like, oh, I’m not gonna think about a pink elephant. And there’s, you know, you can’t think of anything else but pink elephants. So change the pink elephant. Make it a purple zebra. You know, and then you, you can’t stop, think you, you’ve gotta tell yourself what to be thinking on.[00:35:00]

Oh my gosh, this is the worst situation. It’s never gonna change. This is horrible. Blah, blah, blah, blah. It’s done. Goodbye. Say goodbye. How about changing the story? I am getting through this. Life is wonderful. There’s amazing things happening. I could do this. Change the story. Change the story. Change the story.

Change it to positivity. Change it to gratitude, and consistently find yourself in those loops and cut them. . Yeah. And when you’re talking you know, cuz sometimes a lot of people say the same things from a different perspective or background or they use different language, but they’re really conveying the same concept.

And when you are talking I’m trying to find it, but there’s a verse that says, finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true whatsoever. Things are honest whatsoever. Things are just whatsoever. Things are pure whatsoever. Things are lovely whatsoever. Things of a good report. If there be any virtue, if there would be any praise, think on these things.

and that’s Philippians four eight. [00:36:00] So that’s kind of what you just said, that you’re explaining in a different way that it’ll connect with people who maybe won’t pick up the Bible. But all that truth, ladies and gentlemen, comes from God and what Debbie’s saying, you know, there’s a lot of truth in it, so try it.

Debbie, how would you. Encourage people to start, like maybe this is all foreign to them. Maybe they’ve never thought this way. Maybe they’re just starting out on their journey. How would you encourage ’em to start their journey? Make the decision that you want it? Make the decision that today is the day and the mo, the moment is now, and that will change.

You know, really just get excited, excited for your life, and be like, I have a wonderful, amazing journey in front of me and I’m excited for it. And let all of that soak in and. Feel it. You, you, like I said, you’re surrounded by a team. Sit and really feel those cheerleaders, like, yes, [00:37:00] they’re finally doing it, you know?

And you’ll feel it. You’ll feel the goosebumps and you’ll be like, I, this is amazing. I just won the lottery and I don’t even, you know, I don’t even know where to start, but be excited about it. I don’t know where to start. And find the first thing that comes into, head your head and, and start writing. Or maybe it’s go for a, a runner.

You know, some people get motivated in different directions, like, do what motivates you. That’s good and healthy and exciting in that moment because it will only be good, healthy, and exciting if it’s the right thing for you. Okay. I want to call you, like, not call you out, but I wanna put you on the spot.

Okay. So I am a black and white concrete guy. Okay. I’m tracking with what you’re saying. I agree with it. I can tie it back to the Bible. So I’m not against this in any way, shape, or form, but I don’t feel very much and it’s all. Like cerebral and [00:38:00] logic and to the point of I know that it’s defaultly bad, so I don’t know if it was trauma and just life from childhood and it just set me in a program and a rhythm that’s out of balance.

Or is it just how God made me? I’m just Mr. Steady and stable and I don’t feel right, but I don’t have those. I struggle with sadness and depression cuz I’ll think so much. And if I get in the wrong mental space, man, I’ll just go down and I’m just like, oh man, I’m so exhausted. But then I’ll get in the right mental space and I’m back.

I’m like, I can do all things through Christ. And yeah, this sucks, but he’s gonna get me through. It’s not me, it’s God. So I don’t feel much. So how do you, I’ve heard that so many times. Like sit there and close your eyes and feel it. How do you recommend people like me break through and feel? So you said you don’t feel, but at the same time you do feel, you feel sadness and [00:39:00] depressed.

Yeah. I’m not feel like, I guess that’s true. I’m not feeling that joy and that excitement and that woo-hoo happy. Like, I’m not feeling those feelings. Maybe that’s a good clarification. you. Everybody feels like when people are like, I don’t believe in God. I don’t believe in anything. I’m an atheist. I’m like, well, you believe in a God that you know that you don’t wanna believe in him.

Yeah. So you do believe in something. You believe in nothing, which is something. Yeah. You just don’t wanna label it so you feel, you do feel, you feel, but you’re in you. You gravitate more towards the sadness and depress. , which we all do because the doom and gloom is easy. And it’s like, come here, come here, come and hang out.

I got some, I got some wine, I got a, you know, cigar. I got a nice cozy fire. Come and hang out mate. You know? But God’s like, you know, sometimes you gotta walk through that cloud, you know? And there is goodness there, but you’re like, oh, that’s work. Like, I don’t know what that looks like. That’s scary. , you know, but it’s good.[00:40:00]

But the, the doom and gloom is like, oh no, this is cozy, it’s warm, it’s perfect here. You know, you do, you can stay as long as you like, and it’s easy to get there. But to get to the goodness and to the feel good sometimes is a little bit of work. And sometimes it’s hard. So you, again, like, I like to look at it as a cycle, because when your brain’s like, I’m not sure this is new, this is different, but I know how to go there.

I don’t know how to go. So this is easy. Let’s just go there. Mm-hmm. . So catch yourself and be like, I’m having a bad day. And then it’s like, am I really having a bad day or am I just used to having a bad day? Because that is easy to continue where I am and to stay in status quo and to stay at that level.

How about today? I have a good day. How about something really good is gonna happen? How about something really good is gonna happen right now? And smile, because smiling is contagious, smiling is telling. , I could do this. And yeah, and it’s sometimes you’re like [00:41:00] trying to make that smile, but when you’re in that moment of, Hey, I don’t feel anything, you do feel something, but you don’t wanna feel that anymore.

You wanna feel the happiness. So start smiling, start going to search for the happiness. Start making it happen and, and say to that ne, that sad. We’re not, we’re not hanging out anymore. I’m sorry. We’re breaking up. We’re done. I don’t need you anymore because it doesn’t know how to join you. It knows how to bring you, so when you say goodbye and they don’t belong to you anymore, it, it doesn’t know how to move any further.

It just knows how to attract you to go there. And you’re like, you can see it and you’re like, I have nothing. You know when you get to those mine places and be like, oh, oh, I see who’s knocking out my door. Yeah. We don’t belong to you anymore. Sorry. Our dad is paid. Goodbye. I’m going to the good, the good spots.

And it takes a little bit of time, but if you can look at it and laugh at [00:42:00] it, you know, you’re like, oh, there you are. There you are again. Oh, anxiety. They’re a lot of fun. Yeah. I don’t wanna hang out with you anymore, . You are my gaslighting boyfriend. I don’t need you, . And that’s what it is. It’s gaslighting you all the time.

It’s not necessary. And you could break that cycle. And are there any kind of, tips you have for breaking the cycle? Like, do you put like a string on your finger? Do you, you know, like how do you catch yourself in those moments? Things get easier, you know, we get, we, we play how we practice. We get good at what we practice.

So what are the beginning steps to break you out of that mental cycle? I, I would journaling definitely helps. What I would do is I would pick two to three times a day where you’re, This is where a day, part of my day where I feel really. , and this is a part of my day where I feel like bad, right? So [00:43:00] where do we go to?

Do we go to our cup of coffee? Do we go to our phone and start going on social media? Notice that and maybe you, you’re like, I don’t know. So just pick three random times during the day, set an alarm on your phone and say, , how do I feel at this time, at this moment today? And it, it always helps to write it down and be like, it’s 10 o’clock in the morning and I don’t feel good.

I need a cup of coffee. Okay. Okay. It’s three o’clock in the afternoon. I feel really good. I’m going to, you know, I’m going into my next meeting. Okay. Record that for a few days and then start to notice, oh, at this time again, , I need, I, I have a trigger. My trigger is I need my coffee. My trigger is this. You see your cycle, you see how you are, you react.

You, you we’re all creatures of habit. So you notice you are looking and waiting for that alarm clock to go off, and you have a [00:44:00] choice. Like, do I want to pick this time every day to be mad, to be complaining, to be upset? Or do I wanna pick this time every day? To turn it around and make it into happiness.

And that’s a very, very simple, easy way to trigger yourself and to watch your cycles and to see how you gravitate to certain thoughts and certain feelings. And you’ll notice a lot more. You’ll notice a lot of your surroundings. You’ll notice that. . If you wanna make the change, it’s up to you. You notice the conversations you’re having with people.

You know how, how many times a day do we have the most mundane ti, you know, like, oh, it’s raining out today. You know who, the guy that complains all seasons, every season, like, oh, it’s too hot. I’m like, all right, well, I don’t wanna see you in January when it’s. Because I don’t wanna hear that it’s too cold because in July you’re complaining that it’s too hot.

So tell me [00:45:00] what, what’s a good weather day, ? Oh, I don’t know. Cuz I don’t have anything more past that conversation. Right. So that’s your brain. It’s like, well, let’s just talk and be miserable. How about we we’re like, you know what? It’s cold out and I’m miserable, but I can’t wait till July when it’s gonna be warm and I’m gonna be like, this is the greatest, so I’m gonna appreciate the cold, so I can appreciate the heat.

You know, so it is, it’s just the conditioning and, and recog recognizing your cycles and slowly turn them around and it re, even if you just do it once a day, it’ll make a huge differe. Yeah, no, those are some great tips. I’m gonna personally try ’em, so I’m, I’m ready to get over these humps, right? Get the monkey off my head.

So great. So now Debbie, is there anything between birth and today that we missed before we transition to where are you today and where are you heading? So, you know, you just helped us for an hour. How can we help you get to your next. Oh, thank you. I don’t think that we [00:46:00] missed anything. I mean, I think we could be here for forever.

All my stories and you know, I, you know, I’m excited for my path. What I would love to, what would be helpful and I’d love to offer to your listeners would be a free download of my last book, and that would be amazing if you could download it. Give a positive feedback, that would be fabulous. And follow me on social media and the more you like click and , push forward, that always helps as well.

Right now it’s building my, my audience and get the good word out there, so that’s, that would be helpful and I thank you for that. Okay. And we’ll put links in the show notes, but for people just listening right now, what’s the best way for people to reach you? What’s your website? What’s, whether you wanna share your email or you know, what’s your favorite social media platform?

What’s, what’s the way to get to oldie Debbie and take advantage of that special offer? Oh, [00:47:00] thank you. Yeah, I try to keep it very simple. So my website is my name, the simple form of, not kazuki, just Cruz. So it’s Debbie, d e b b y k r u s z.com. And my social media is the same. My f I guess my more preferred is Instagram and LinkedIn.

That’s probably where I’m the most active. But I’m also on Facebook TikTok, Pinterest, Twitter. If I miss one I’m pretty sure I’m overwhelmed with enough of the social media, but that’s all at Debbie Cruz, d e b b y k r u s and z. Beautiful. Now, when our listeners go to your website, do they need a promo code for the book or is it theirs a free download?

It, it, I will leave you the link with the code in the notes. So the code is Blake 20. Okay, awesome. So ladies and gentlemen, if you’re not in a place to write it down, we’ll get you [00:48:00] that code. But Debbie, thank you for that generous gift. And to our listeners, like our slogan says, don’t just listen to great content and read great content that Debbie’s given you, but do it.

Repeat it each day so you can have a great life in this world. And most importantly, an attorney to come. So, Debbie, it’s been a true honor to have you here. in any aspect. Have we missed anything that you wanna discuss or is there a final thought you wanna share with our audience? I just want everybody to know that they’re divinely made on purpose to be you, not to be judged or to be somebody else.

And you know, God loves you and wants you to smile and enjoy every day. Amen. And I’m gonna practice that too, cuz I wanna feel more joy and peace. And I thank you for your help with that, Debbie. So ladies and gentle. Please like this episode, subscribe, share it with your friends and family. Hey, even share with people you don’t like.

You might become friends, but listen to what [00:49:00] Debbie said. Reach out to her if you want to continue the conversation, and we will see you next week. And Debbie, again, thank you for your time today. Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it. Ciao.