“It’s not the cards that you’re dealt, it’s how you play the game.”

– Randy Pausch via Brenden Kumarasamy

LISTEN TO THE PODCAST 🎧

WATCH THE PODCAST 📺

EPISODE OVERVIEW: 

Have you heard the one about the boy born with a bad arm whose family immigrated to Canada for a better life? You know, the one where from the age nine he pretty much couldn’t speak the language and felt isolated and alone.

Although he had many obstacles in his way from being an immigrant, to having an ability (what some people call a disability), to having a father who was an alcoholic, to having a real communication issue, you’re going to see how todays guest took all of these “bad” cards that he was dealt in life, and learned to play them well. Now he’s not only living a prosperous life that’s fulfilling for him, but he’s spreading the success to his family, friends, and us today.

In this episode you’re going to hear about living generously, escaping poverty, and taking the lemons we’ve been dealt and make lemonade. Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the Brenden Kumarasamy story!

 

GUEST BIO: 

Brenden is the founder of MasterTalk, he coaches ambitious executives & entrepreneurs to become top 1% communicators in their industry. He also has a popular YouTube channel called MasterTalk, with the goal of providing free access to communication tools for everyone in the world.

 

SHOW NOTES:

Guest Info:

 

Special Offer(s):

 

Core Themes, Keywords, & Mentions: 

  • Abusive father, alcoholic father, poverty, escaping poverty, born with a disability, physical abuse, mental abuse, maturity, numbing the pain, hatred, isolation, Canadian, American, Indian, English, French, Tamil, social anxiety, social outcast, Louise Howe’s the school of greatness podcast, suicide, accounting, big four accounting firms, speaking, what do we want in life, who already has what we want, safety net, backup plan, strategic giving, generosity, learning to speak, communication, success, blame people for your successes, how your enemy can be your greatest gift.

Full Episode Transcript

Escaping Poverty, Living Generously, & How Our Enemies Can Become A Great Gift | Brenden Kumarasamy

Hello friends! I’m David Pasqualone and welcome to this week’s remarkable episode of the podcast. Today we have a young man who was born with a bad arm. He was born and his family immigrated to Canada. From there for all the way to the age nine, he pretty much couldn’t speak the language in Montreal.

And he had many obstacles in his way from being an immigrant, from having an ability. Some people call it a disability. It was an ability. Then you had, his dad was an alcoholic, he had a communication issue, and you’re going to see how he took all of these cards that he was dealt in life. And learn to play them.

And now he’s living a prosperous life that’s not only fulfilling for him, but it’s spread to his family, his sister, and he shares that remarkable gift with the world. So you’re going to hear about living generously. You’re going to learn about escaping poverty. You’re going to hear how to take the lemons and make lemonade.

How our guest today, his worst. Became his greatest gift. So ladies, ed and gentlemen, unless you’re driving, get out your pens and paper to take notes. Enjoy our guest story, and then apply what you learn and let us know how it’s be benefits your life. So ladies and gentlemen at this time, Welcome to the Brenden Kumarasamy story.

Hey Brenden. How are you today, brother? Good, David, how are you man? I am fantastic. Remarkable even, and I was just telling our listeners a little bit about you and we can’t wait to jump in.

So for listeners who’ve been with us for years, or listeners who are new, what Brendan and I are going to do today, we’re going to go through his life story. He’s going to talk about the highs, the lows, the everything in. We’re going to stop along the way, break down the successes and the things Brendan was able to overcome in his life.

So you can too, and I can too, right? So we all work together, and then at the end of the episode, there’s going to be gold nuggets all along the way that Brandon’s going to bless you with. But at the end, we’re going to transition to where’s Brendan today and where’s he headed? So now we can help him get there, or you can continue the conversation and get some coaching or whatever you need [00:03:00] to do with Brendan, my friend.

Does that sound good? Are you ready to start? Let’s do it, David. All right, man. So where it all begin for you? Where were you born? What were your family upbringing like? Let’s, let’s go right to the. Absolutely meant I was born and raised in Montreal, Canada, at the Montreal Jewish Hospital, even if I’m not Jewish

And that’s, that’s where the story starts. I didn’t grow up with a lot, you know, my parents immigrated from Sri Lanka in the early nineties to Canada in search of a better life. And I was the first person in my, in my ancestral lineage, so to speak, who was born in the first world country. So super thankful for that.

They were both factory workers and my little sister, who’s four years younger. Was an English teacher today is, is pretty much what my family looked up, looked like as a combo. I would say for me, the biggest thing that sticks out to my childhood is, is the dysfunction. I grew up with an alcoholic father, so I struggled a lot as a kid because he would drink a lot.

So that’s one [00:04:00] challenge that I had. The other piece was I didn’t really have that much money, and the third was I didn’t really have that much alignment growing up. Like for me, the focus was I got put in a French school when I was five years old. And the reason is because in Montreal you need to know how to speak that language and it’s a language I didn’t really know that.

So that’s where the story begins. I, I grew up in a, in an environment where I couldn’t really talk to anyone else from like the age of five to nine until I learned French, and that’s where a lot of the struggle began. Another struggle as well is I have a broken left arm. And the reason I have a broken left arm, David, is because I was born upside down.

So when I got pulled out of a vacuum, it dislocated my, my left arm. So I had that social anxiety. Okay. Now, for some of you who are watching, a lot of, most of our audience listens through the podcast. Some are watching through the video cast. But when you say a broken arm, is it, do you have a full arm and it’s not functional?

Is it cut off at the elbow? Okay. So yeah, so, [00:05:00] so it’s completely functional. It’s just crooked, so the angle is off. Gotcha, gotcha. And then, so growing. Did you get picked on? Was it just, you said you had some social anxiety. What was going on with that? Yeah, for sure. So, so I definitely got picked on as a kid because I didn’t, I didn’t know the language, so I couldn’t even talk to the people that were picking on me.

And I also had a big cast, David, from from kindergarten to first grade that I’d walk around with. But I will say that I did get lucky a little bit because I am Canadian, I’m not American, so, so a lot of the, the people weren’t so bad to me, but that’s where the story began. Okay. And then when you were growing up, I mean, when we grew up, our environment is our environment and we don’t really think about it beyond that.

Sometimes it’s quote good, sometimes it’s bad, but it is our normal. Were you aware that you didn’t have like you knew, obviously your arm was broken and other kids weren’t [00:06:00] like that, but with your father and the alcoholism, did you just think every family was like that or did you know something? I definitely knew something was up.

I didn’t really know what to do with it or how to react emotionally to it. I think a big theme in my life is this idea of control. So I never really felt I had control in my life. I couldn’t control the outcome. When you’re eight years old, when you’re nine years old, you can’t really do anything about it.

Since he was both physically and verbally abusive to all of us. But I would say for. The piece was, that’s what, that’s why later in my life I wanted to become successful, mostly because of control. If I had money that I could just make my own decisions and live the life by my own terms. Okay, and then did you, did you say you had older brothers or sisters, or were you the oldest?

Firstborn Canada. You got an oldest first born and so I was born in 96 and then my little sister was born in two. So just the two of you, [00:07:00] you’re learning the language. So what was that like? Did you have a close relationship with your mom? Was she working all the time? How, how was that communication and just social setting?

Absolutely. You know, I’m super, I actually still live with my mom more for, to help her financially, but, but yes, you know, my mom is my greatest. Me and her are super close. We have a great relationship. The only difference I’ll add as a nuance is we don’t really communicate in English though, cuz our mother tongue is Tamil, which, so I speak three language.

I speak English French to Tamil. So growing up as a kid we, we didn’t really. Talk that much because my dad intelligently so never wanted my mom to speak to me in English or in French or else I would catch on their accent. So what would happen is we would just verbally communicate a lot of the times and I would talk to her in English and she would talk to me back in Tamil.

But then as I got older, I eventually learned how to speak Tamil. So we, we pretty much just talk in Tamil with each other. [00:08:00] Nice. Now, You said you live with your mother now, so I take it your father’s not with you, and I don’t want to jump around the story. So basically you’re growing up, you’re in Canada, takes you to about the age of nine before you can speak fluent.

French so you can, you know, Montreal, French Canadians, and then as you’re there, you’re growing up. Do you feel like socially edu you know, are you keeping up with the kids? Is it like at school? Is it just a hostile environment? You know, everything that happened. I’m not trying to probe just to be nosy, but it all makes you the man you are today.

So what was going on in that world up until the point of, I guess, nine, when you start really learning the. Of course, and it helps me as well. So, so these questions are appreciated, David. So, so essentially what happened at that point was, you know, like I said, a lot of social anxiety things, things were struggling.

I would say the next step in the journey was really when I was 12. So when I was 12, what happened is a bunch of career counselors came into a [00:09:00] room. I was in sixth grade, and they all looked at us and they said, you all need to figure out what you want to do in. So usually when you’re 12 you say something like, I wanna be an astronaut or a standup comedian.

Whereas for me, what I realized in that moment was that I wanted to be an accountant. And the reason was because I didn’t know what an accountant did. I actually never figured that until I was 19 . But I, I did know that I was really good at math and really terrible at everything else, and I saw getting that job as an exit to poverty, whether I like the job or not.

So, so that’s why, you know, a lot of people talk about passions. David Restas for me, I. Considered my life like a passion until maybe recently with what I do now, but at the time it was okay, what’s going to generate me income, guaranteed salary so that I can leave this place and never have to talk to my dad again and, and really take care of my, my mom and my sister.

That’s really all I cared about, even as a 12 year old. I think what, what this dysfunctionalism teaches you if you learn the right lesson is it helps you mature a lot [00:10:00] faster. So I was definitely more mature than most 12 year. In the same way today, I’m a lot more mature than most 26 year olds, I would say.

So that level of maturity, that quickness, that rapid growth is really what propelled my success later in life. Yeah, and for anyone who. Endured a difficult childhood or even adulthood, you just, you kind of get that stolen away from you, that purity, that fun, that innocence, and you end up being a little adult and sometimes you have to take care of your parents.

So it’s tough. It’s tough, but it’s does make you a stronger human. So, Not the path you want to go to get there, but it works. Right. So now you said at 12 things started really changing. What happened then? Was your father still at the home to that point? That’s correct. I would say the biggest change happened and just to give, CONT passed due in 2019.

So he did like three years ago. Okay. For liver disease, but for the. For the pizza around my dad. So between the ages of 12 and 15, what happened? [00:11:00] 15 was another big moment in my life where I actually decided to stop talking to him. So what had happened was I was working really hard, I was studying for high school, I was trying to get really good grades so I could be valedictorian and like there’s, he had just too much to drink and he just kept opening the door all the time and bothering me, just like saying, Hey, why are you on the computer?

And he just kept yelling at me and he does it all the time. And at that point, Snapped and I just stopped talking to him. So what happened from the ages of 15 until he passed? I actually never spoke a single word to him until his last day. Wow. Even if we lived in the same house. Now, did he live with your mother?

Did she stay with him all the way through? That’s correct. Okay, now let’s do this. Then we’re kind of jumping around. So between 12 and 15, let’s go back there because we’re going to start asking questions and get into specific topics. But from 12 to 15, what, what happened in that gap? We kind of skipped that.

Yeah, so I was, is that where you just decided you wanted to be an accountant? Then you start working for that? Correct. So what had [00:12:00] happened was when I was 12, 11, 12 years old, David, I wasn’t really taking my education super serious like any other 11 year old kid, you know? Yeah. You’re just, you’re just living your life.

I, I would say it’s really when I got to high school that I shifted. And I think the reason I shifted though, I’m not a hundred percent sure of it either. I think the main reason is cuz I’ve realized that I was a few years away from freedom. If I just worked really hard for the next five to seven years and I got the job that I wanted, I could start calling the shots.

And then what had happened as well around that time is my dad lost his. We got, we got into a really bad financial situation, so, so that also gave me a kick in the behind to do really well academically. So when I got into high school, I started studying like I never did in my life, and my grades started shooting up.

So that’s when I realized that I was really good at academics, something that I didn’t know before. So I said, okay, if I spend the next seven to eight years just [00:13:00] focused on this, I can get the job that I’m looking for and, and exit this craziness for. All right. So you saw the education as a way to get outta your circumstances.

That’s correct. Okay. Now let’s go back from 15, from the moment when you stopped talking to your dad between birth and 15. Is there anything else significant to cover in your life? Is there anything with your mom or sister or father before we we go to that moment? I think the only other piece, which is more of a theme throughout my life, David, is really the theme of lack.

So, so I never really had a lot of money. Growing up as a kid, that’s probably the biggest theme that sticks out to me, where, you know, every time I wanted something, whether there was a chocolate bar, whether there was a video game, whether it was something I really, really wanted in my life, I could just never have it.

It was, it was always a no. I remember so much so that I was, when I was 12 or 13 years old, I found ways [00:14:00] to make money online. I started being a, a toric on Amazon mechanical toric. Basically, you get paid like two bucks an hour to, to like do data. So I started doing that under my dad’s name, just so I could make an extra 500 bucks after like a month of work just to buy video games and things like that, or, or like a console and, and people, my parents were like, where are you getting all this money?

It doesn’t make any sense. So that’s the only other theme that sticks out to me, I would say from that period. But I would say the biggest one is really stop. Stop talking to my dad, probably. Yeah. So let’s go to that because I believe, and you correct me if I’m wrong, everybody loves their dad and their mom.

Everybody has a father and a mother. You know, father and mother who has you biologically a mom and dad is who loves you, nurture you and raises you. But even if you have a bad father or mother, you still have this built in natural instinct to wanna love your parent. But there’s times where parents truly.

Not in a good place and they’re [00:15:00] just abusive to you, or they’re physically, mentally, emotionally, sexually, all sorts of ways. So you do have to kinda shut him out. But what was it like living in the same house and just not talking to him? I mean, that’s kind of, you know, that’s hard. And especially if he gets drunk.

Did he abuse you more? I mean, what was that like? For sure David, and it’s the right question to ask. Here’s what I’ll say. Here’s what I’ll say. Everyone’s got their own perspective on this, but for me, what it came down to is I realized in retrospect that the decision I made at the time I. Was a very difficult one and one that I don’t think most people can make.

So I was at an interesting crossroads in my life where he was the only negative person left in my life. So I realized in that moment that if I cut him off, I would be able to achieve all of the success that I wanted to. But of course for the first few weeks of doing that, it was really challenging cuz my mom, my dad just kept yelling at me to keep to talk to him, but I just never did.

And then 90 days [00:16:00] later they just accepted it as status quo. And the reason I made that decision was because he was so negative that it was going to impede on my own success. And, and the way that I balance this with. Is you always wanna try and make an effort to build relationships with the people around you.

So let’s just say my family members, my cousins, I have a really great relationship with them. But if someone is so far beyond left, you need to make hard choices and you need to be willing to delete people if you want to be successful. And that’s just the decision that I made. And of course it was super hard, like at some point what had happened.

I just, I just got really cold. I kind of numbed the pain. I think that’s basically what had happened and to the point where I just didn’t care anymore. And, and to be honest, the reason, you know, I could tell you it was really hard, but in retrospect it really wasn’t. Cuz I had a lot of hatred for him as well, which has gone away, you know, a lot since then, which we can talk about later.

But I think, I think the piece [00:17:00] around it is that I had so much animosity towards him. It was easy for me to kind of just shut him off for my life and we just accepted a status quo. Like literally everyone knew that I wasn’t talking to him and everyone just accepted it. And there was obviously, I’m sure there’s points and things that happen within the home that would be normal conversation for even coworkers in the office, but you just absolutely avoiding him.

Zero. I would even look at him in the eye. And then I just pretended he didn’t exist. Did he ever make the effort or attempt to communicate with you and try to restore? He did for probably the first 60 days, but then he gave up to, and he just like, that’s it. So then

that’s definitely. Not a normal scenario and you’re living in this and now you’re still trying to finish high school and get the grades and to get off into [00:18:00] your own, you know, your own healthy space. So bring us through there. You made the decision to stop talking to your dad. He was pulling shenanigans, you know, being an alcoholic.

You’re, you said he lost his job, so it put a lot of financial burden on your family. So as you’re going through high school, where does your life go from? Right. It’s a good point, David. It, it, I definitely make it sound normal, but it definitely was adorable as a, and I don’t wanna insult you, but I’m being realistic.

Like, you know, if I have things in my family are dysfunctional, it’s dysfunctional, and you living with someone and not talking to them. I’m not judging you or saying right or wrong, but I am saying that’s not something that normally happens in everyday life. Cuz if you shut somebody off who’s toxic, usually you remove yourself from that environment.

But you were a young man, you were in high school, you couldn’t do that. Right. So that’s why it’s, it’s, it’s a very unusual, but I think a, there’s probably sadly more listeners that are hearing you tell your story that can. [00:19:00] You know what I mean? That’s probably something that sadly too many people today can connect with.

So that’s why I really want to dig into the facts and then we’ll go back and we’ll reverse engineer the successes you had to recover from all this. Right brother? So, so I would say the first piece. Was really isolating myself from everyone else in the house. So, for example, I do most of my work in the basement and I would have a headset on so I wouldn’t hear most of the noise that was happening.

And that was regardless of what it was. So that was a, a big piece. I wouldn’t hear the, the drunk noises, all that piece. I might see ’em lying around on the floor at like 1:00 AM in the morning, but I would just. Walk over him and not walk on him, but you know, over him and just Yeah. Physically walk around the body.

Yeah. So, so I think for me the, the isolation was key. But another piece that I think is important as well, cuz at that age I could leave if I wanted to, but I’ll tell you why I did it. The biggest reason, but that, that has some reason to do with financial, but it wasn’t the biggest one. It’s cuz it would hurt my.[00:20:00]

That’s why I never wanted to do it in South Asian culture, which is more specific to the culture I’m in, it’s, it’s very important to take care of your family even if you don’t like them. Like even when I became successful and up until he died, I still paid for all of his alcohol. I never, I never complained about it once.

And that’s because in our culture, it’s important to take care of the people around you, even if they’re, they’re, they, you don’t want them to be taken care of in that way. And my mom was stuck too. Like the only thing that she had was her kids. So if I, if I’d left her too, she would’ve been in a, I was the only hope.

Like, I mean, my sister were the only hope in her life. And if we both leave, then what does she have? She has nothing, right? Yes. So, so that’s why it was really important for me to. And to also help her in this crazy situation. Like, remember, I, I think it’s actually more important to focus on her than me in the sense that from the ages of 13 all the way to 22, she’s the one who raised me.

Like she, she had a single family income. She went into a lot of debt so that I wouldn’t work and, [00:21:00] and yet a lot of success that I have today. So she put in a lot of that time and it was that anxiety that she would always have around money. That drove me to make a shit ton of money because I knew that if I made that money, she wouldn’t have to stress anymore in the same way she’s retired now.

But I, but I think that’s the, that’s the crux of the story. Yeah. So talk about with You mentioned earlier that you had like social anxiety, define what you were experiencing for social anxiety. And then I do want to touch on, even though this is your story, the Brendan’s story, I want to touch on how did this affect your sister? Cuz now you have a little sister, she’s looking up to you, she’s seeing all this going on.

So kind of let’s, let’s go through the social anxiety. That you faced that finally made you get to this point? Like, I need to protect myself. And then what was your sister, was it just okay or did she have the same issues? Right. So I would say the social [00:22:00] anxiety and, and if I’m being perfectly honest, it didn’t last so long.

In my life, it was more between the ages of five and 10, right? That’s where I had most of the social anxiety because I felt like an outcast. And the reason I felt like an outcast was because I didn’t know the language that everyone else was speaking. Everyone else was talking in. And the way that I overcame that, funny enough, was I found a small community within the French school that spoke English, so I just spoke English with them, and that’s how I overcame the social anxiety.

But in terms, in terms of my sister, which I think is, is more interesting of a tale. So she never had any of these problems growing up. I, I think it’s just a, a thing around young daughters. The father just never does anything to them, and in my case, he definitely didn’t. So I think it was more around the approach that she took was different than mine.

So, so she talked to him. Very often actually. And the rationale she gave me, which I totally respect and understand, was if, if we both stop talking to him, then it’s just like she’s going to go into a [00:23:00] massive depression. So that’s why she kept in contact with him. But it definitely, the negativity definitely affected her though, for sure.

Okay. And then now, You’re working, you’re taking care of your family, helping your mom. She’s working, she’s primary caregiver. You graduate high school. Do you go off to university? Do you decide to go in the professional realm? Where does your life go from there? Yeah, for sure. So what happens after that, David, is I realize that I’m probably five years away from getting the income that I’m looking for.

So I go to college for two years and that’s how the education system works and came back, and then I go straight to university. Okay. And then in in university I get a bachelor’s degree in accounting. Cause I felt that was the safest route. And I still didn’t know at that point what an accountant did.

Right. , I just knew that I was good at math and terrible at everything else, but I knew that was going to be the guarantee that I was looking for. I was really looking for guarantee. So I wasn’t looking to be an entrepreneur or doing any of the things that I’m doing [00:24:00] today. Like it has nothing to do with what I’m doing today actually.

Funny enough. So it was really like, that’s the guarantee. And then when I got to university, that’s when everything changed. . Okay. And then before we get to that part of your story, The teenage years, the children, you know, children’s age, there’s so much to do with sports and there’s so much to do with activities and running around, but that really takes time and money.

And two parents, two parents on two kids is hard enough, right? With your arm, were you able to act, be active in sports? Did you get more crap about that? Did you not care about sports? What, what was that? Interesting question. So, so I did have sports for sure, just not the highest level. So I, luckily for me, and I don’t even know where they found the money, it wasn’t that expense.

It was like 50 bucks a month. There was a dojo next to, next to my house. My cousin really wanted to be in the dojo. He wanted to do karate, so I kind of got forced into it. [00:25:00] So I did martial arts for five years. So that’s where a lot of my, my mentality and my mindset comes from. And it also gives me time away from the house I’ll.

That’s actually what happened when I got older is I would just stay mostly at school so I wouldn’t have to spend any time here at home. Right. Talking to other people or, or my dad specifically in this case. So, so there’s that. And then in terms of the, the athletics, I was good at sports, but I obviously wasn’t exceptional.

But I do have some mobility with my left arm. It’s, it’s just in terms of the angle that’s a bit more challenging. Like guitar was really hard. I’d played guitar for five. And I’m not an expert by any means. It’s just really hard to move my fingers around like that, but, but in terms of like basketball and things like that, I was fine.

Nice. Very good. Okay, so let’s do this as the first kind of major talking point where you’ve already brought so much to the surface. So you’re talking to people who are listening now, they’re going through the same situation. They have an abusive parent and they’re like, man, [00:26:00] what do I. You’re going to be able to look back on your life right now, Brendan, and say, man, these are good decisions.

And you’re going to also look back and say, yeah, I wish I could do these things differently. What are a couple things you’d say? This is what I’d recommend. If you’re in that situation, you’re an abusive parent, try this. And then things you’re like, you know what? I’m not you, but probably going to fail big time if you do this.

Don’t do this. You know? So order a couple dos and don’ts of being in an abusive home to recover and to overcome. Great question. Here’s what I would say, man. I don’t prescribe more solution to other people, cuz what I did was really cool in retrospect. Right. Cutting someone else fully. And I’ll be honest, and I’ll say this on the record, I don’t regret that decision.

You’ve been in the slightest because that 15 year old Brendan needed to make that decision to become 26 year old Brendan today. . So I don’t regret it, but I do argue that it is a bit extreme. So here’s what I’ll say. Let me start with this. It depends on the [00:27:00] level of it. So every, there’s a great quote here by Randy Post, I think explains this really well.

It’s not the cards that are dealt, but rather how you played the game. So the first step is to really understand the cards that you have. Is it that all of your parents are abusive? Is it that everyone hates you in your house? Cause some people have that situation and I definitely, you know, am empathetic to that.

Even if my dad was an alcoholic and he made his mistakes and he wasn’t the, the most perfect human being in the world. None of us are perfect. It’s not like the guy did anything really bad in a sexual way to other people. Like he was not that kind of a bad father. And there’s other people that are in life, so, so I.

The first step is to really assess the cards that you have in your hand, what’s the situation, and really assess it properly. That’s the first step I would recommend. The second one is to present alternatives back to yourself. So look at your life and say, okay, what are the different options on the table?

I could run away from home. I could sit at my friend’s house, I could just put it out on the table. I could stay home for another five years, what would [00:28:00] happen? And start assessing alternatives. And then the third piece is pick the right alternative that makes sense for the situation that you are in. So in my case, I could have left my house a long time ago, but I chose not to because I wanted to share the pain that my mother was.

Cause I thought that was really important for me to do. Other people can’t do that, so it may not make more sense for them. Maybe the answer is, Hey look, if everyone is a drug addict or something in your house, you should probably leave. Try get out of there. Like run away, do something. But I think the key is really to take the time to self-assess, to see what cards you’re given and to make the right play for the right decisions.

And that’s also why David. I was really good academically cause I really wanted to rush my degree there. I remember when I got to university, I did a four year degree in three, just so I get to the money a year quicker and I just did it that way so I can get to the capital quicker. I get to the pay so I could start stacking cash and then have all the leverage in the family.

So I actually sprinted with that in mind. [00:29:00] So that’s also important to consider. But I would say those are the most important things. And then the last piece is if you need to cut somebody off, Always ask yourself what the person, 10 years older than you would think of that. So for example, if I was 15, I would ask my 25 year old self what that person would think.

And often when we listen to our own intuition, the answer will come for it. Yeah. And I, I want to add just a little bit because if you haven’t experienced it and you haven’t worked through a problem, a lot of times you don’t. What to ask or are there other alternatives out there? So make sure you find someone who has your interest at heart.

Find Godly counsel and get people who you can bounce ideas off of. Because Sadan wants to always take us and isolate us. It’s like hunting. You have the animals, the packs of animals. When they want to kill another animal, they separate it from the pack, they isolate it and they devour it. [00:30:00] So you don’t want to get off on your own and do everything on your own cuz that can really, that usually 99 of a hundred times.

Ends badly. So what Brendan’s saying I agree with, but I do say definitely look at some options with other people that you trust because you’re probably not thinking of options or you would’ve already taken the best option. And it’s not because you’re stupid, it’s not because you’re a bad person, but you don’t know what you don’t know.

And I can build on that as well. David. I’m glad you brought that up. I actually did that with my cousins a lot because, because what’s, I mean, it’s not funny, but it’s just realistic. All of our, all of us had alcoholic dads, like literally all of us. Mm-hmm. , there wasn’t one of us who, who had a normal dad growing up.

So what we would do is during Christmas, when all of our. Drunk fathers would gather for those Christmas holidays is we would sit down and strategize sometimes, Hey guys, this is what I’m thinking. This is what I’m planning on doing this. I’m going to play out my university career and this is how I think you should all be doing this too.

And we’d have candid [00:31:00] conversations around the without anyone. Else listening to us. So I don’t necessarily think you need a therapist. If you can afford one, go for it. But I think anyone in that situation probably can afford one. So Oh yeah, I’m, and just so you know, I wasn’t saying just a therapist. Like a paid therapist.

Yeah, yeah. Just, you know, there’s people in the community that are, you see they have their act together. They’re not have another ulterior motive, maybe a guidance counselor at school, even though most of those are liberal whack jobs, . But if you find somebody who’s a solid human, that that’s there, that’s what I was referring to.

For sure. Which, which I agree with. Absolutely. So I would say the easiest way to go about this, cuz I didn’t really have that many great role models either. The only thing I actually had that was really useful besides my close family members was a podcast like this cuz when I was 20, there wasn’t a lot of podcast back then in 2013.

And I, I was listening, I would listen to Lewis’s podcast, school of Greatness. That’s how I learned everything about personal development and. It’s free. So I got to learn through that. But besides that, cuz I, I don’t have access to the people on that podcast. What I did [00:32:00] was mostly close family members. So one, one thing that’s interesting to think about is making a list of all of your family members and figuring out the ones you can confide in, or if you, if it’s literally zero in a and my heart goes out to people that it is zero.

I hope, I hope it isn’t for most of us. Luckily for me it wasn’t Zero. It. It could be friends, you know, close friends around you, but start with someone. I think that’s the key. And then you could level up your network over time. Yeah, 100%. I agree. And the other thing I want to throw in there is suicide.

Some people don’t see any hope, so they consider suicide, and that’s nuts. That’s a long-term. Solution for a short term problem. We have so many people, not just guests on our show, but so many people I talked to were in such a bad place in life and it did look like this is never going to get better. But I, not even a year later, sometimes just a few days, sometimes a few months, sometimes it’s five years.

But typically it’s not as long as you think. Life changes dramatically for the better. [00:33:00] Especially once you get outta high school and you know what I mean? You’re out of that forced environment and it’s just never, ever, ever commit suicide. God is a special plan for you. He is not a vindictive God. He’s a loving God.

He created us with a purpose for a reason. All the bad things are cassan, not cuz of. And if we decide to take our own life San and wins, if you can endure and get through, you’ll have only blessings. Not just in this life, but in eternity to come. So like, I don’t know if suicide was ever something on your mind.

Okay. You’re shaking your head. So go ahead, talk about that cuz that’s serious. So, so many people are falling for that right now with the isolation of covid and all the lies out there. How did you, when were you first thinking about suicide and how long did it. Yeah, so the reason I don’t talk about it that much David, is cause it didn’t last that long.

It was literally a day in my life. But since you brought it up, I think it’s important to consider it. It happened once when I was 13. I never attempted, but I did think about it right Once I remember. [00:34:00] Vividly. It was a long, long time and never, and I never had that thought ever again. So it’s not as severe as some people have had.

Mm-hmm. . So basically what had happened was there was some problem with the computer that my dad was just blaming, yelling at me. This is before I’d cut him off. Right? Because remember I cut him off around 15. Yeah. Yeah. So then at some point I’m waiting for the metro and I’m just thinking to myself, what if I just jump off like all of these.

Problems just wouldn’t happen anymore. And I could just live peacefully. But then I, that thought immediately stopped cuz I realized how much pain my, my mom, my sister, would be in. Yeah. Hundred. Worse my eyes out for a day and I got over it. I think that’s the key. . Yeah. But some people, Saint will just keep attacking that cuz he sees a weakness.

But man, don’t even, you don’t joke about suicide, you don’t joke about divorce, you don’t joke about certain things in life. You. Face it and move on and realize it will get better and it really will get better. You just gotta keep moving forward. So, Brendan, in your life now, you go to college, you go to [00:35:00] university, you’re taking some podcasts, you’re, you know, personal development beyond the college, and where does your life go from there?

Yes. What happened at that point, David, was it got to my first semester of, of Univers. And once again, I still don’t know what accounting does. I, I just knew I, I was going to get good grades and hopefully I’d get a job. And then I learned really quickly about the Big four accounting firms, Ernest and Young Price, Waterhouse, Coopers, kpmg, Deloitte.

And people are telling me that if you get a job at one of these companies, you’re set for life. So I said, okay, this is my North Star. But I was so lost, cuz remember my parents were factory workers. I didn’t have that much of a network. I had a suit that I bought from Sears, which is now a bankrupt company that was bigger than than my body cuz we spent a hundred bucks on it.

And my tie just didn’t stop by my belt. That’s how lost I was. I thought Price Waterhouse Coopers was a water bottling company. That’s how ridiculous I of, of low knowledge I had. So anyway. I’m in my first [00:36:00] semester of college slash university, and I find out that the way to get these jobs is to do these things called case competitions.

And then I go, what’s a case competition? And then a bunch of these students who had jobs at these companies start explaining what these competitions are. They go, you know, there’s a business, they give you a business problem. A bunch of these executives from these firms, they evaluate the way you communicate.

And if they like it, they’ll give you a job. So I saw case competitions, David, as my ticket out of poverty. So I took it. So I studied really hard, I got good grades. I started doing these competitions and I eventually, I got drafted into one of these teams and that’s how I ultimately got the job at one of the big four accounting firms.

And then after I started working there, I just got really good at coaching people and how to speak through those case competitions. And that’s what later changed the course of my. Okay. And then [00:37:00] when you were looking at, you saw the target it, you know, that became your goal to get a job with the big four.

You reverse engineer. Now you saw the path, these case competitions, and then you went for it. Talk about the mindset involved in that because to you, you’re done. It’s go over with, right? But people are listening to this podcast, we, not just what you did, but how did you do it so they can too. So obviously you, Brendan, are different than me.

David, and our listeners are different than us. But there’s a mindset involved in what you did and you have the goal. And then you had reverse engineered the plan, but then you had to work the plan. So how did you keep moving forward each day to achieve that plan? For sure, David. So three questions to consider.

The first one is to figure out what we want in life. What do we want in life? The second question is, who already has what we want in our life? And the third question, which is more communication related, is how is the person that that [00:38:00] has what we want in life? How are they coming across? How do they communicate their ideas to the world?

So let’s focus on the first two questions to the purposes of right now. So for me, here’s what I knew. I knew that I wanted a job in accounting. I knew that I wanted stability, but what I didn’t know was what job I needed to get. Where did I need to work? So what did I do? The first step was just talking to people who are two years, three years older than me, who are two to three steps old.

Ahead of me. And that will look very different for all of us. But in my case, what that looked like as a first semester student, a first year student was just going out to cocktails of student run events of people who are finishing their university degree, just to see what opportunities were out there.

Cuz I still didn’t know what the goal was. So I would start talking to these people. And I would say, what are you doing after school? What job are you getting? And I would just be the best student in the room. And that principle can be applied across the board, whether you wanna be an accountant, an actor, just no more than everyone else in the industry by just asking more [00:39:00] questions and asking for help.

So I, I would go to this. Cocktail, which doesn’t, isn’t really, it’s like a bar and, and we’re literally hosting the free hors dvs and stuff, which like felt like a million bucks to me cause I didn’t have any money. I was like, oh my God, free food. Like this is crazy. And I had my oversize suit on, right? No, in the pockets, that oversized suit,

Hey, don’t tell anyone about that part. But, but yes, like I looked like a do fist pretty much. Like I got like a big suit. I got my crooked left arm here. I’m walking around. So I’m talking to all of these and I’m nervous, right? Cause they’re like much older. They have these jobs and I know. So I’m like nervously talking to them.

I’m going, hi, my name is Brendan. I just had some questions and I’m super thankful. They were really nice to me, right? So they would go like, hi Brendan, like what’s your question? I was like, so like, what are you working on? What are you? So I’d ask him in a very awkward way. This is not like what Brenda is today.

Where I was, which I was 19 at the time. I’m awkward. I don’t have a business card. I know any, oh, any of this stuff works. But I start getting information, Hey Brandon, I actually landed a job [00:40:00] at this company called PWC last summer. I was like, oh, how did you do it? And they would say, oh, I started doing these case competition.

I go to an expert, said, oh, I landed this job at Kpmt. I did case competition, somebody else, cause I did cakes. And this theme just keeps coming up and up and up. So then the next part of this is to find the. Thread, what is everyone doing that already has the success that we want? What are they all doing consistently?

The answer was good grades and case competitions. So naturally where my mind went to next is figure out what these things are and how do I participate in them? And that was the third steps to take action on the threads that you’re seeing and asking for help and not being afraid to ask the questions that allow you to get the success.

Excellent. And then of course, while this is going on, Good grades, case competitions. So now those have substeps. So I just wanna make sure our listeners understand that you have that big picture that Brendan’s talking about, and then you have the subpoints, and when you’re reverse engineering and those have subpoints, [00:41:00] but it’s a constant conscious effort.

It doesn’t just fall into our laps. It took real effort. So now you finish your degree at university. What goes on from there? When you graduate, you said you got recruited by a big. Right. And, and now we’re getting close, right? Cuz that was four years ago. So you’ll, you’ll hit my age pretty quickly at this point.

But the, but what happened just focused on the degree a little bit. So I had done all this networking, I had met all these people, done all these case competitions. I even just, to your point, you know, success is all about understanding the steps, not necessarily just seeing someone being successful. I emailed.

Like 20, 30 executives at the Big four people are really high up. People never do this when they’re 19. I just sent those emails cause I know Advantage. I didn’t know anybody in the industry so I just said shit. Like if I just emailed these people and a lot of them met with me cuz they said, who? Which kid is a first year student?

I wanna meet this kid. Like, what is this guy doing? He’s like emailing people. So I started [00:42:00] meeting people at pwc and EY and KPMG and Deloitte, all the top executives. And that’s actually how I got the job. Yep. Right? So, so the year after when I applied for the jobs, I got it. But here’s the accidental thing that happened, David.

Hey, before you go on, I want to people right now, there’s so much flux in the world. Brendan and I are from two different generat. I was born in the seventies. He was born in the nineties. You might be born in the 2000. It doesn’t matter. Real people, human connections, go for it because you the same way Brendan got his first big break.

That’s how I got my first big break. Heard about a company, thought it was too good to be true. Found out who the CEO was, found out who the chief operating officer was. Kept harassing ’em until they either hired me or sued me. And I, when I had my first, you know, the, the resume and the phone calls and the emails get you the phone call.

The phone call gets you the [00:43:00] interview. The interview gets you the career, and that’s where the opportunity starts. But just like Brennan, you were writing the higher ups and they’re like, who is this kid? And they pull you up. Go for it. You know, they got nothing to you. Got nothing to lose. Don’t be afraid to talk to bosses and owners and board of director members.

Go for it. Get up there and, and just kickstart your career and hyper drive. So now go on, finish. Keep going. Now I just wanted to make sure I throw that into Brendan’s, not the, he is an anomaly in a good way. But you can be too. I personally did it. He did it. And anybody who really takes the effort, just keep going.

It will. Absolutely David, I’m such a big, and I’m glad you jumped in with that because I’m such a big believer in a club by Kevin Durant, which is hard work beats talent. When talent fails to work hard, doesn’t matter how talented you are, the the talented person will always lose to the person who’s working harder.

eventually, and that’s really the key is I never took chances of my success. Did I get [00:44:00] lucky that those executives said yes? Absolutely. But the part that wasn’t luck at all was having the courage to send those emails. That’s why I was like to say for people who are on the younger side, use age as a strength, not a weakness.

If you’re 50 years old and you’re messaging someone who’s 50 years old, they still might meet you, but they’ll think in their mind, what’s the person’s. Whereas if you’re young, you might think, oh my God, I don’t have any experience. They don’t wanna talk to you. They actually wanna talk to you more because they know there’s no agenda.

They know it’s just helping. In any way that they can. So leverage that, and I’ve definitely leveraged that in my life. So then what happened? Let’s recap a little bit here. So once again, my goal here isn’t to change the world. I’m not trying to be the next Deepak Chopra. I’m not trying to be Oprah. I’m literally my big goal when I’m 19, let’s say you’re talking 19 year old Brendan.

We’re having a drink or like a juice. You’re asking, what’s your big dream? I’m literally looking at you and I was like, I want a $50,000 your job. That’s literally my. And I didn’t even think I could get that. So it’s [00:45:00] okay to dream small. Obviously my dreams now are much bigger, but that’s where I started.

So then when I got the job, it completely changed my life because I realized in that moment that I could manifest what I wanted in life. So when I would stare at the building and everyone else was complaining about the long. At pwc or any of these companies or how hard it was. I was just grateful. I was looking at the building, I was like, holy geez, like I’m on the 20th floor of this building.

I’m getting paid 20 bucks an hour. This is insane. And that’s the. That’s the mentality ahead. But what happened after that? What happened was I accidentally got really good at coaching other people how to speak. So how did that happen? As I was doing these case competitions, David, and people were doing these and winning them, and I started doing well in them too.

Nobody was really helping with their communication, so I just sat down. I started coaching them, [00:46:00] not because I was good. But because I really enjoyed it, and that’s when I started helping them get results. And that also made me really good at coaching. So then the last thing that happened in university was getting the job at ibm.

I ended up pivoting careers from being an accountant to being a technology consultant. And I did the same thing the following year. I started emailing a bunch of executives and consulting and then I got a great job there and I had a great job lined up post post university. Very good, very good. Now, when you left from the accounting to the it, when you were making the transition, Everybody gives these same obstacles.

Well, you don’t have any experience, or, yeah, you didn’t get this degree. But it really is just a mindset and it really is just how you approach it, taking your weaknesses, making ’em your strengths. So how did you approach the transition, maybe for our listeners who were thinking about changing career paths?

How did you approach the [00:47:00] transition? What was your mindset and how did you sell it to. Absolutely. So the most important thing that a lot of people wouldn’t mention on a podcast that I will is that a safety net. So in case this transition didn’t work, I had a full-time job offer at pwc, would’ve worked there as an accountant, I’d still be able to figure out what I wanted to do, and it was a lot easier for me to get that job than the one in it.

That’s the first piece is have that backup plan if you’re really making a 180 pivot in your career. The second advice that I would have, Is be sure you grab coffees with people in the company so people feel your personality that they can’t feel in a resume. They can’t feel, you know, until they meet you in person having those referrals.

And the third piece is just really being a good person. Because I had helped so many people, David, when I was younger in university, what happened? All of them went on to get the jobs that I wanted. So they all started referring me to their companies. That’s how I was able to get a, an interview at ibm cuz I had a lot of friends who had worked there and they said, Brendan’s the guy.

[00:48:00] He really helped me when I was doing my interview cause I was just a real, just a nice guy. And I think, I think that’s a really underrated skill, just being nice to people. Mm-hmm. . And the reason is because it builds equity and reputation so that when you need the favor, you’re going to have a lot of people who wanna call that in for you.

So I would say that’s the third piece. And then the last one is just do more than your competi. That’s, that’s always what I think about is like if somebody else is applying for the same job as me and case competition was a big factor, they would look at David, I just did more than any other applicant, so I got the results that no other applicant did.

Beautiful, and let’s do a point of clarification and you can agree or disagree with me please. Being a nice guy is important. It says, you know, the two most important commands in the Bible is love God and love thy neighbor. So helping people, being there for people, supporting people is absolutely good.

But that doesn’t mean you have to be a doormat or you have to be used or abused. So make sure if you’re listening, you have the balance. Do you agree with that brand? [00:49:00] For sure. For sure. It’s, it’s all about balancing. Here, here’s what I like to see. I see it as give strategically. So what does that mean?

Cause that sounds offensive. So what I mean by give strategically simply means the best way to give is to give to other generous. So being generous isn’t enough. You need to give to other generous people so you get fed back into, whereas the pro, some people to your point is they are doormats. They just give to everybody, which is okay, but it’ll burn you out really fast.

Yeah. And then it won’t be sustainable. Versus if you’re giving to people who are equally generous and it’s up and you gotta give a little bit to everyone to figure out who’s actually generous. And then when you find out who those people are, you triple down on just those people like I’ve done in, in my, in my young.

Yeah, I couldn’t agree more. I see so many kind people get burned out because they give what they don’t have or they give, give, give till they have nothing. That’s not what God intended and that’s not what we’re supposed to do, cuz then we’re beat up and spit out and, you know, [00:50:00] chewed and, and just discarded.

So you wanna make sure you have a balance. You’re helping people, but not at the expense of yourself. Now, Keeping in balance. There’s always humility, there’s always giving sacrificially, but those are the exceptions. When God tells you, I’m talking about the everyday life, it’s not like do somebody else’s work, so they get the promotion and you’re in the same position for 20 years.

That’s what I’m talking about. Okay. So now you get this new career, you’re at ibm and where does your life go from there? Right, so then I start my career at IBM in April, 2019, which, Three and a half years ago as of this recording. But the last step to the college, the university life was my last semester in school, David.

So my last semester in school, what happened was I sat down with one of the students I’d help. I probably coached 60 or 70 people on communication. Cause I was just doing it for fun. I wasn’t charging anybody. It wasn’t a money thing. I was just helping a bunch of people. And then my last semester, One of my friends, Azi looked at me and he asked me the most [00:51:00] powerful question of my life that completely changed the course of it, frankly.

And the question was, how did you learn how to speak? And I looked at him and I said, what do you. Said, well, did you do Toastmasters? Did you watch YouTube videos on communication? What did you do? And I looked at ’em and I said, I don’t, I don’t understand. They said, well, a lot of people regret communication, Brendan.

They, they do something like they do training. And I realized in that moment, David, they didn’t have any formal training. I was just a really good speaker. I’d coached a lot of people, but I was just doing it as a, as a hobby. It was just for fun. I wasn’t looking to monetize this. Create a business or a movement out of it.

I, I was really gun set on ibm. Cause remember my first two years at ibm pretty much paid off all my family debt cuz the second I like to skip ahead a little bit. The second I started ibm, I starting to make 75, 80 grand a year, which is a lot of money in Montreal if you live all in under the same roof.

So I just started stacking and I started paying off all the alcohol, all the stuff until we were, we were good. And then I retired my mom. That’s what happened basically. But then in my last semester, I thought, huh? Well, I got four months before I [00:52:00] start working at ibm. I got the job. I’d worked for 11 months to get this offer.

I’d get all the coffees, did all the interviews. I got the opportunity. Now I can rest for four months before I start making money and finally getting the freedom that I’d wanted since I was a 10 year old boy essentially. So it was definitely a big deal. I got really emotional when I got that job. And I bought steak for all my friends, even if I couldn’t afford it.

It’s funny, . But anyways, that, that, that helped me anyways. So then I started watching videos on YouTube, on communication, and I was really pissed off. And the reason I was really pissed off is every video had a pitch. Every video wasn’t good. Every video wasn’t exciting. I was like, how can you be a communication expert and not be exciting at the videos?

So I got so pissed off that I just started making videos of my mom’s bass, like on that couch over there, and I just called it Master Talk and it just took me to a place that I never would’ve imagined. And here we are today. That’s basically the long story. That’s awesome Brendan. So before we get on [00:53:00] to where you’re at today and where you’re heading and how people can connect with you between your birth and today, is there anything else we missed in your story or anything else you want to add?

You’re like, you know what, listeners need to know this. If I had this, I could have skipped five years of my life, not. Not chronologically, but effort wise, I mean sure. Effort wise here. Here’s what I’ll say. You know, the reason I became successful, David, and it’s not a good thing, it’s a bad thing, is because I always wanted to prove my dad wrong.

Always. You know, I told myself that cuz he always told me I couldn’t be successful. So I said, let me prove you wrong. I’ll be so successful that you’ll be blind. And that’s really the, the mindset I’d had growing up as a kid. And I find a lot of successful people have that insecurity as they, as they get up.

But, and I think the biggest transformation I had in my life as I look back on these 26 years is really coming to the conclusion. And it was hard for me, David, this is not like a one two step, like a Sierra kind of deal where I [00:54:00] woke up one day and I said, yeah. This is super simple. No, it took a long time for me to realize that my dad was actually the greatest gift I could ever have in my life.

And it was really tough for me to admit that. And the reason is because I always created a game that it was me against him. But I think when I learned when he was in that frail bed in the last month of his life and he was super weak and his liver was gone, he wasn’t going to make it at this point. And I was, it was just three years ago, like this was not like a century ago.

And I looked at him and I realized that the game was rigged from the beginning cuz there wasn’t a. There was nothing there. It was just a man who had made mistakes and I created something out of nothing where I’m trying to beat this guy. But the truth is, you know, he’s done so much in his life. He immigrated 25 families from Sri Lanka.

He’s done so much good in the world. He, yeah, sure he had made mistakes with alcohol, but he wasn’t the worst dad in the world either. And I think when I’d come to terms with that, I saw my dad as a gift because if he never immigrated to Canada, I would never have the success I have. [00:55:00] I would never have to drive the ambition.

And that’s why Tony Robbins says all the time that if you’re going to blame someone for your failures, you might as well blame ’em for your successes too. And I think that’s the big thing that I’d love to, for people to keep from that story is sure if you need to use somebody as motivation, as anger to get something done, I’m not against it.

I’m not against it at all, but I would say at some point in your life you need to have, you need to come to terms and be in peace with it, because that person won’t be alive at some point in the same way. He’s not alive anymore. It took me, it took me to learn of his passing to, to learn that lesson, but I’m glad I did or else I’d be angry and frustrated my whole life and I’m glad I’m not in that situation or in that state.

So that’s what I. Excellent. Yeah. And as a 45 year old man, there’ll be more of this lesson that’ll come and grow and we’re all growing, we’re all developing, and when we’re done, God will take us home. But for right now, we’re all learning and growing. So it’s good that you had that. And you [00:56:00] said you did talk to him before he passed away?

That’s correct. Three days before he passed, we talked for five minutes for like the first time in what? Seven, eight years And then that was it. He was gone 72 hours. Was it a pleasant conversation? Were you able to get some closure or was it just awkward? It, it wasn’t very long actually. It was just it’s funny, no one asked me this.

It was like a minute and a half, two minutes. I just said how he’s go, how he’s doing. And I just said, you know, I really appreciate it and stay safe. And I left cuz I had to go to the US for something. So, and then he died. Well, he didn’t die, but what happened was I got to the US and then I got a call that he was like, we didn’t realize he was going to pass that quickly.

So then I flew back and I was there in time and then he was, Man, I’m sorry to hear that. All right, well, so where’s Brendan today? Where are you headed and how can we help you get there as a community? For sure man. For sure, man, I, I think this is a good place to get into the mission now since you’ve learned my whole life story, so I might as well give you the punchline.

So what’s the punchline, man? I think the [00:57:00] punchline is, I really believe, I won’t say the word God specifically, but I’ll see destiny, spirituality, the universe, I really believe taught me all of these lessons and made me go through all of these experience to realize what my true mission is in life, which is this, and it’s through a.

So it’s 2014, David and Taylor Swift wins an award called Billboard called a Woman of the Year by company named Billboard, and she stands up in front of that audience and she looks at the crowd and says, your future woman of the year is 11 years old right now. She’s in choir. She’s learning how to sing, and she has big dreams to be a big singer someday, and we need to take care of her.

And then the TikTok, I’m watching flips six years into the future, and Billy Eilish becomes the youngest inducted in the billboard’s history to win Woman of the year, the age of 17. So she gets up on that stage, she’s got her big bulky jacket, her big glasses. She’s looking at the stage and she’s going, But [00:58:00] yeah, I can’t believe I won this award and it is so cool and, and she just rambles for like the next five minutes and the last 60 seconds changes my life.

She looks at the crowd and says, yeah, in like 2014 and I was watching Taylor Swift speech and I was 11 years old. I was learning how to sing and I was in choir and you all took care of me. So thank you. And the reason I always get goosebumps when I tell that story, David, is because I always think back to the next Elon Musk, cuz when Elon Musk was 13 years old, nobody gave a shit about it.

He was just some kid in South Africa who was being abused by his dad. Nobody knew who he was going to be, the talent he is today. And more importantly, in the context of my work, my dream, my ambition, nobody helped him with his communication skills. Nobody sat down and said, who cares if you can’t afford a coach?

Like we should help you like get rid of your fill awards and all that stuff. And then I thought about the next Elon, because the next Elon is 13 years old. As we’re having this very [00:59:00] conversation, we don’t know who that person is. It could be a girl in Cambodia. We have no clue. But one thing is for sure, as that person does not have access to free communication resources.

So what’s the game? For me, the game is really simple. Empower every genius of our society to become exceptional communicators and become the next deal Carnegie, because if I do that, then every human being who’s a genius in our world will become a great speaker, share their ideas with the world in a much faster and efficient way, and move us as a human race at a faster pace, and that is my ultimate dream.

Awesome. People want to get ahold of you. They want to connect, they wanna learn, they might wanna hire you for coaching. Where do they reach you? For sure man. Thanks for this conversation. David. I’ve been a hundreds of podcasts. This is definitely the deepest one, so I really appreciate it, . It’s, it’s good prep for the other ones.

Hey, our goal is to seriously help people grow, help you glorify God, just all love God. Love each other, man. [01:00:00] Love it man. Super blessed and super grateful, man. So thanks for having me. So, two ways to keep in touch. The first one is the YouTube. Which is master talk in one word. And the second is my free workshop that I do on communication.

It’s on Zoom, it’s every two weeks, and you go to rockstar communicator.com to attend. Excellent. Excellent. Well, you truly are a remarkable guy and you’re still young. Got plenty of life ahead of you. Statistically, you and I could die today. We don’t know, but hopefully not, man. Yeah, I mean, statistically we got some time, but you don’t know.

I’ve been critically ill three times and I’m 45, so I know today’s a gift and I’m just thankful for the present. Right. I wish you only the best. Hopefully we, I’m sure we’re going to stay friends, stay in communication, and if you wanna learn to be a better communicator, if you wanna learn to build that confidence and break free and turn what you consider your enemy into your greatest gift, talk to Brendan.

So Brendan, [01:01:00] thank you for being on the show. I really appreciate your brother. Like we, David, this is a trait. Thanks. Oh, awesome. And to our friends, to our listeners, to people. It’s your first time or your hundred 40th episode. We love you. Have a great day. And like our slogan says, don’t just listen to what Brendan said, but do it.

Repeat the good parts that you need each day so you can have a great life and this attor in this world and an attorney to come. So share this with your family and friends and the people you know who need it. Again, we’re not trying to pimp the podcast, we’re just trying to help you and your friends and family and the whole world grow.

So I’m David Paone. This is the Remarkable Brendan, and ladies and gentlemen, we’ll see you in the next episode. Chow.

[01:02:00]

More From Today’s Remarkable Guest

Brenden Kumarasamy
Brenden Kumarasamy | Escaping Poverty, Living Generously, & How Our Enemies Can Become A Great Gift

HOW TO SUPPORT THE REMARKABLE PEOPLE PODCAST:

  1. Share the podcast with your family, friends, and co-workers.
  2. Subscribe to our YouTube Channel AND Monthly Email List.
  3. Rate the podcast in your favorite podcast player. 
  4. Review us on sites such as Apple Podcasts, Listen Notes, our website, social media pages, and more.
  5. Sponsor an Episode at https://DavidPasqualone.com/SponsorInfo. 
  6. Donate what you can to help us bring more great content to the world.
  7. Contact us and let us know how the podcast has made a positive impact in your life!

HAVE A QUESTION?


THE NOT-SO-FINE-PRINT DISCLAIMER: 


While we are very thankful for all of our guests, please understand that we do not necessarily hold or endorse the same beliefs, views, and positions that they may have. We respectfully agree to disagree in some areas, and thank God for the blessing & privilege of free will.

THANKS FOR JOINING THE REMARKABLE PEOPLE PODCAST!🎈